Home > *NSFW*, Live Blogging, Random Nonsense, THE INFAMOUS JCITY™ > #NSFW: Random Nonsense ~ The Weekend Of 2/10 – 2/12 *LIVE*

#NSFW: Random Nonsense ~ The Weekend Of 2/10 – 2/12 *LIVE*

#NSFW: Random Nonsense ~ The Weekend Of 2/10 – 2/12 *LIVE* 

by THE INFAMOUS JCITY™

[Editors Note: This post is officially one for the history books. I talked about the first time I smoked weed, my issues with insomnia, delivered a full length WWE Friday Night Smackdown Review, exposed Jersey Shore’s Mike “The Situation” as a faggot, shitted on the death of Whitney Houston, dissed a bunch of popular acts in the Music Industry, responded to some fan mail and hailed Hitler. To say this post was controversial would be an understatement, so if you haven’t checked it out, what the fuck are you waiting for?]

Welcome to “Random Nonsense”, a new experimental blog where I will write LIVE about whatever the fuck I want to write about, ALL WEEKEND LONG. I have not giving any thought to what I will end up posting here, but hey, at least I had the courtesy of labeling this post NSFW, just in case I decided to randomly shave my balls and post a picture online so the whole world can check out my crazy manscaping skills. Like I said before, I will be updating this blog ALL WEEKEND LONG so make sure to check back often. This is either going to be a massive success or a failure of epic proportions. Fuck it though, here goes nothing…

Friday 4:09 AM – 4:20 AM

So how the fuck would someone kickoff a random ass blog like this? Well, for starters it’s 4 ‘O clock in the fucking morning and I can’t fucking sleep for shit. Don’t feel bad though, I’ve had problems going to sleep at night for as long as I can remember. Some would say that it’s because I find ways to distract myself throughout the night, be it with television, the internet, video games, porn, music or writing, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. While it’s true that some of those things may just be making my insomnia easier to excuse, I can lay in the dark for hours at a time, bored as fuck, trying my best to go to sleep, but that shit never goes the way I would like it to. I don’t mind it though. I’m at my most creative in the middle of the night. I embrace the darkness. I guess you can call me a Creature of the Night. All I really need is about 3-5 hours of sleep to function properly anyways.

All day I have to deal with people and their fucking problems, so is it wrong if I stay up all night and indulge in myself? I don’t think so, but some people look at insomniacs as people who might have other underlying problems. As crazy as I might be, I don’t think I have any underlying problems. I’m not suicidal, I don’t abuse my wife (and I only masturbate after my bitch is sleeping and she got enough dick for the day), I don’t go out looking for trouble, I don’t kill people, I don’t molest children, I don’t intentionally break any laws (anymore), I’m somewhat educated, I might like alcohol, but I’m no alcoholic, so on and so forth. Anyone that judges me for being an insomniac can suck on my sleep deprived dick. I guess it’s a good thing that I no longer drink soda (unless it has alcohol in it), smoke cigarettes (unless I’m out drinking and no I’M NOT A GODDAMN ALCOHOLIC) or drink coffee like I used to because then my sleep deprivation would be at an all time high, like it was a few years ago. I remember one time I stayed up for close to 72 hours just so I could kick it at an All-Weekend Rave (I know what you’re thinking, I’m too damn ghetto for a fucking Rave, but my girl at the time was white and she had a banging body, so how was I to turn down her invitation?) , but I think the drugs helped me stay up that weekend (and trust me, there was a fucking TON of drugs at that fucking Rave). Speaking of drugs…

Friday 5:09 AM – 5:30 AM

I FUCKING LOVE WEED!!! I’ve smoked it (bongs, blunts, joints, you name it, I’ve toked it), ate it (in brownies) and vaporized the shit out of it. I find that it calms me down, makes everything around me better (the quality of music, art, writing, and anything else you can possibly imagine goes way up shortly after you smoke), makes me last longer in bed (takes my 25 minute average and boosts it up to over an hour), peaks my creativity (so no, it doesn’t kill my brain cells) and gives me not only the munchies, but contrary to the reports of all weed smokers being lazy as fuck, it also gives me the energy to burn off any excess calories the munchies might have provided. In the last two years I have increase the amount of weed I smoke (not by much, maybe 1-3 extra blunts a day). I think I might be over compensating my intake in order to make up for not smoking cigarettes anymore, but it’s not like I’m seriously addicted to it. I can stop smoking for a week or two (and I have) and not feel the urge to relapse, but I just love smoking my goddamn cannabis. I love the smell, the taste, the high and the culture. If I could go anywhere in the world, I would go to Amsterdam, take up residence in one of their world-famous coffee shops and never come back. What? There is the American Dream and then there’s the Stoner’s Dream. Don’t judge me.

Friday 6:33 AM – 7:01 AM

My love affair with Mary Jane started off innocently enough. I was around 13, maybe 14 years old, when a friend of mines happened to score a dime bag from one of the older kids at school. As soon as he showed me the bag there was no need for peer pressure, I was down to try the drug that all the rappers glorified in their songs and that the older kids around my way smoked outside on a daily basis. It was early in the day so we left school around 2nd period to go to a nearby park. My friend was also able to score three Zig Zags and since he didn’t know what the fuck he was doing, he gave me the rolling papers as he broke up the weed. Once he gave me the broken down buds I tried to roll a joint, but fucked it up something serious. I tried again and rolled a nice fat joint. Ok, so maybe it wasn’t that nice, but it was smokable (I have since improved and can roll with my eyes closed) so that’s all that mattered. Anyways, I passed the joint to my friend since he was the one that brought it, he light it up and took a hit. As soon as he inhaled he started choking on the smoke as I nervously laughed. I didn’t want to choke when it was my turn, I wanted to be cool about the situation so when he passed me the joint I inhaled deeply, and fucking choked on the smoke like a fucking retard. We kept passing the smoke, getting better at inhaling with each try. When we were done, we both grabbed a slice of pizza from the local Pizza Shop, went to CVS and sprayed on some cheap cologne and went back to school. By now 3rd period was starting so we split up and went to our respective classes. Up to this point my initial experience with weed was kinda lame because I didn’t even feel high at all. I thought smoking weed was a big waste of time and I sure as hell didn’t understand why so many people glorified the use of pot until I went to math class and my teacher started teaching.

The fucking weed snuck up on my ass like a gay ninja in heat and fucking slayed me (PAUSE). Time slowed down for a second and when everything went back to normal I couldn’t stop fucking laughing. Everything everyone said was hilarious as fuck and this quickly irritated Mr. Swinky (I couldn’t make that shit up even if I tried). The more Swinky talked, the louder I laughed. When he would ask me what my problem was I would say “Nothing Mr. Swinky” and bust out laughing because HIS GODDAMN NAME WAS  MR. FUCKING SWINKY!!! After telling Mr. Swinky to leave me the fuck alone and go suck on a winky, the whole fucking class lost their shit and started laughing their asses off. I was then removed from class for causing a disturbance and was later suspended for 3 days. When I went home my mother beat my ass like she always did every time I got in trouble, but I didn’t give a fuck, I was fucking high as hell. Me and Mary Jane have rolled together (pun intended) ever since. Me and that bitch have been through the highest of highs (you guessed it, pun intended) and the lowest of lows, but she never let me down. I’ve met lots of great friends through our mutual love of marijuana and when I was flat broke, kicked out on the streets because my parents couldn’t handle my rebellious ways, Mary Jane let me pimp her ass on the corner just so I could survive. Weed literally saved my life and maintained my sanity until I meet her more lucrative white friend who also let me pimp her out on the block, but that’s another story for another day.

Friday 7:29 AM – 7:57 AM

Like I said before, weed has allowed me to meet alot of like-minded individuals. From weed smokers from the hood, to stoner hippies that only smoke out of bongs and play Hacky Sac all day, to preppy douchebag types that only wear Polo’s with the collar up, I’ve been able to associate with many types of people who I might never had the pleasure of meeting if it wasn’t for weed, but my favorite type of person weed has allowed me to meet by far has been BITCHES!!!! I fucking love me some bitches. Skinny bitches, thick bitches, tall bitches, short bitches, low self-esteem having bitches, stuck up bitches, cute bitches, alright bitches, sexy bitches, it doesn’t fucking matter what kind of bitch you are, if you got a fucking vagina I can stick my dick in then I fucking love you bitch. So anyways, I remember this one bitch named Carmen that always brought weed from me. We started talking, we hit it off and the next thing I know I was living with her. Never mind the fact that I was only 15 and she was 26, so technically I was being statutorily raped, but the bitch was sexy as all hell. We would get baked on a daily basis and have fun, but after a while I had to move on because she was too immature for me since my hectic lifestyle at the time forced me to grow up before I was ready to. I think that may just be the reason I’m sorta immature now, making up for lost time on some Michael Jackson shit, but unlike Michael Jackson, I will NEVER stick my dick inside of a little boy’s rectum. Moving on…

I remember this other bitch that tried to suck my dick for an ounce, but I talked her down to a dime bag. She was a desperate bitch, but she was so fucking cute that I had her whip out her titties and give me a topless blowjob in a Burger King bathroom. I couldn’t believe that bitch. She didn’t really know me like that and she was gulping down my jizz like it was a fucking milkshake and it was all for a fucking dime bag. I love all types of bitches, but stupid bitches are my favorite kind. Anyways, I have to go take a shower and eat breakfast so I can go get my day started, lack of sleep be damned. Before I go, I want to dedicate the following song to any and all stupid bitches reading this shit right now. I’m not hating on you hoes, just want to inspire you to get better. I’ll be back later on today if I even remember this little experimental blog and write more Random Nonsense. Peace fuckers.

Friday 7:11 PM – 7:27 PM

Just got home not too long ago, but not before picking up a case of Coronas. Like I said before, I’m not a fucking alcoholic, but it’s Friday night and I just want to kick back and fucking relax. I’m not going out tonight since going out every weekend doesn’t agree with my wallet at the moment, plus I’m in a committed relationship so my days of hanging out in the streets 24/7 are basically over. I don’t mind though, me and my bitch make the best of it and I wouldn’t trade in my current lifestyle for anything in the world. This is what single people dream of, so I can’t really complain. One thing I can complain about though is a cold fucking plate of food. After a long fucking day all I want to do is come home to a hot meal, crack open a brewski and watch some motherfucking TV. There is no reason why my plate should be cold after I fucking called before I came home saying I would be there within 15 minutes. That should have been plenty of time to fix me a goddamn fucking plate and stick that bitch in the microwave to ensure it was hot by the time I came home. Whatever, I’m not in the mood to argue right now, but I’ll remember that shit when she asks me to do something for her later. I should be petty and withhold sex, but then that would be punishing myself and I’m not into self-torture. I have to bust at least one nut a day. What? I’m a normal heterosexual man, don’t you dare fucking judge me. Fuck this though, I’m about to drink me a beer and eat me some motherfucking chicken before Friday Night Smackdown starts. Catch y’all later.

Friday 8:10 PM – 8:35 PM *LIVE Friday Night Smackdown Review*

So Sheamus kicked off the show by telling us what we already knew and that was that he was waiting until after the Elimination Chamber to pick which World Championship he would wrestle for at Wrestlemania 28. He said he was bullied as a kid and fought back against the bullying. I can only imagine the torture the other kids put Sheamus through, being a soulless pasty ginger and all. He says he got so good at fighting back that he made it to the WWE because of it, where the bullying continued. That little promo was followed by Smackdown Elimination Chamber participants Wade Barrett, Cody Rhodes and Big Show coming out, one after the other, to claim that they will be the ones that go on to win the Elimination Chamber Match and be the one to face Sheamus at WrestleMania. Other than Sheamus, the only other Superstar that stood out to me was Cody Rhodes, especially when he said that Giants can win Super Bowls, but they can’t seem to win at WrestleMania. He then said Big Show was like a reverse Undertaker because of his losing streak. I legit LOL’d for that one. Cody is fucking awesome and it’s been a pleasure watching him grow from a certified jobber to a bonafide championship caliber Superstar. Anyways, everyone in the ring started brawling and to my surprise Teddy long didn’t come out and make a Tag Team Match. That didn’t last too long though because after Smackdown came back from commercial, they announced that Teddy did indeed make a Tag Team match for later on in the show. Teddy Long is too fucking predictable. Too bad I can’t bet on wrestling because his tag team matches are a sure thing and would make me a millionaire.

Jinder Mahal vs The Great Khali was next. Jinder is garbage and Khali just fucking sucks so I had no interest in that match whatsoever. Next…

Aksana and Teddy Long were shown backstage. Damn, I would so fuck Aksana. She looks like she enjoys giving wet sloppy blowjobs and enjoys the anal. Anyways, it was hilarious when Daniel Bryan interrupted them. He was pissed about Teddy Long having a BBQ earlier in the day (BBQ in the winter time? Who does that?). He’s really taking this whole Vegan thing to heart and I fucking love it. I’m a carnivorous motherfucker and think Vegans are a bunch of pussies, but Bryan makes it work for him and as a wrestling gimmick it works well to generate him some heel heat. Bryan has a match against Randy Orton later on which should be the main event. Really looking forward to seeing that match.

Divas match was up next. Alicia Fox vs Beth Phoenix. I wonder how long this match is going to last… and it’s over as soon as it started. No Diva in the WWE can give Beth the business straight up, but I guess WWE is pushing Tamina as the next big thing in the Divas Division. Let the battle of the manly looking bitches commence. I would rather see Beth go up against Kharma, but that’s just me I guess.

Friday 8:40 PM – 8:48 PM

So, WWE aired yet another video package on The Rock, but this one has definitely been my favorite thus far because it highlighted his life long love for wrestling, his childhood growing up and his drive and dedication to becoming one of the greatest WWE Superstars of all time. I can’t wait for The Rock to come back and give John Cena the ass whooping of a lifetime.

Backstage Tyson Kidd was talking to Natalya, but the bitch farted (I personally think she queffs, but that’s just me) so hard he ran away and Hornswoggle died. Thank you Natalya. I don’t know if the bitch has been eating too much dairy lately or if she downed a whole can of beans before that segment, but anyone that can kill Hornswoggle with a little ass gas is a savior in my eyes.

Up next is Cody Rhodes and Wade Barrett vs Big show and Sheamus.

Friday 8:51 PM – 8:56 PM

Wade Barrett’s new theme song does not suit him at all. Every time I hear it I envision a surfer type character coming out. The last thing WWE needs is another damn surfing gimmick. Tyler Reks hasn’t been able to shake off his stint as WWE’s resident surfer and has remain in Jobberville ever since riding the wave to mediocrity. Anyways, average match so far. I don’t know about anyone else, but I would love to hang out with Sheamus at a Blacklight party. That motherfucker would shine so bright it would be the most hilarious thing I have ever seen. Smackdown goes to commercial, time for another beer.

Friday 8:59 PM – 9:06 PM

Heels work on Big Show as Cody hits a beautiful Missile Dropkick on the World’s Tallest Athlete. Wade and Cody continue their assault on Show, which I’m sure will lead to the hot tag to Sheamus, but I’m just going to act like I’ve never seen a predictable Tag Team Match in my life. Show finally fights Wade off by crushing him into a corner, but Cody hits him with the Beautiful Disaster. He goes for a Sleeper, but it isn’t enough to keep Show down. Big Show uses his massive girth to crush Cody and makes the hot tag to Sheamus (told you so). The 2012 Royal Rumble winner comes in, cleans house and picks up the win by pinning Wade Barrett after hitting the Brogue Kick as Big Show spears Cody Rhodes straight to hell. Decent match. Could have been a bit longer though.

Friday 9:09 PM – 9:21 PM

I find it funny how WWE is using Nicki Minaj’s song “Turn Me On” to promote WrestleMania since it’s a song about a desperate girl seeking a man that will get her pussy wet just to give her the penetration she feels she deserves. So yeah, Michael Cole is in the ring and he’s asking AJ questions about her injuries. AJ says that Cole has cause more damage than Big Show did when he ran her over by always insulting her boyfriend Daniel Bryan, the Divas Division and herself. She rips on him and calls him a bias, obnoxious jerk. Cole tries to defend himself, but AJ tells him that the WWE would be a better place if Cole was just to shut his goddamn mouth. Finally, someone is telling Cole how it is. AJ is coming off as a face and Cole takes advantage of this and starts planting seeds in her head as he tells AJ that Daniel Bryan purposely had her stand in front of Big Show to get hurt in order to keep his title.

Daniel Bryan is pissed off and comes out and promises to break both of Cole’s arms if he keeps insulting him or his girlfriend. Daniel says he’s more than a footnote in WWE history because he’s a great wrestler, a role model and the World Heavyweight Champion. Bryan says that he took a nature walk during the Super Bowl while the rest of the country sat home and ate meat and drank beers. He once again goes into a Vegan tirade mixed with a little bit of recycling talk. Daniel Bryan cares about the environment and what do the fans do? They boo the crap out of him because they are inconsiderate assholes. Daniel Bryan is a fucking saint and should be treated as one. We can all learn something from following Daniel Bryan’s lifestyle. Anyways, Bryan tries to leave the arena with AJ, but is stopped by Teddy Long who tells him that if he leaves the arena he will be stripped of the title. That Daniel Bryan is one sneaky little bastard, but he’s fucking awesome as fuck right now.

Friday 9:26 PM – 9:27 PM

Ted DiBiase vs Hunico. No thanks. Bring back Sin Cara Negro dammit. *Cracks opens another beer and rolls a blunt*

Friday 9:37 PM – 9:41 PM

Video highlighting the Elimination Chamber is shown.

John Laurinaitis is still the Interim RAW General Manager and is one the phone doing what he does best and that is kiss the ass of the WWE Board of Directors, all the way from Abu Dhabi (East Bumblefuck for those who don’t know what the fuck a Abu Dhabi is).

Up next is Randy Orton vs Daniel Bryan. I really have high hopes for this match.

Friday 9:45 PM – 9:51 PM

15 minutes left in the show with Big Show on commentary. I sense some type of interference happening before this match is over. I wonder how Bryan is going to weasel his way out of this match since that seems to be his current modus operandi. Good match so far, with Orton dominating the early going, teasing confrontation with Big Show and getting hit with a running knee strike from the apron courtesy of his opponent as Smackdown goes to commercial.

Friday 9:53 PM – 10:01 PM

Daniel Bryan was in control of the match as soon as Smackdown comes back, but Orton quickly turns the tables and dominates until he goes for a SuperPlex, Bryan knocks him down, goes for a splash from the top rope and misses, so I guess Orton is still in control. After delivering a Scoop Slam, Orton goes for his Middle Rope DDT, but Bryan fights out of it, goes for a Missile Dropkick but is thwarted by Orton. Orton then pulls off a SuperPlax which is too risky of a move for someone who just had a herniated disk to be pulling off, but pulled it off he did. With the greatest of ease I might add. What followed next was an awesome back and forth between Orton and Bryan. LeBell Lock blocked by Orton, Bryan tries to escape, but Orton hits the DDT. Bryan goes to the outside, demands his title, but Big Show snaps and attacks Bryan. Show tosses him back in the ring and Orton hits Bryan with a RKO, but it’s too late because the ref called for a disqualification. Orton confronts Show, Show pushes Orton and all hell broke loose. Smackdown goes off the air as Big Show and Orton kicked each others asses as Daniel Bryan stands on the ramp, smiling, with his World Heavyweight Championship drapped over his shoulder.

Friday 10:04 PM – 10:11 PM

*Cracks open another beer and inhales a massive amount of marijuana smoke* I wouldn’t mind seeing Randy Orton vs Daniel Bryan again, with more time and no shenanigans involved. As some of you might know I predicted that match to take place at WrestleMania, but there’s no way it happens now that Sheamus has won the Royal Rumble. I hope Daniel Bryan can hold on to the his championship past the Elimination Chamber and then WrestleMania and go on to have a feud with Orton over the title. That feud would have all the potential in the world to deliver a few Match Of The Year contenders. Anyways, I’m done writing about wrestling for the night. I’m about to go get some pussy. See y’all on Saturday.

Saturday 2:45 AM – 3:49 AM

What’s up bitches!?! I’m fucking buzzed right now, the wife has gone to sleep and now I’m bored as fuck, but I know I can always count on y’all to brighten up my day. How you ask? Well, I stumbled upon an interesting email in my inbox from a fan that goes by the name Glenmob62 and the email reads:

J, how are you doing man? I’ve been a fan of yours for a while now and love your take on wrestling, but I find it unnecessary for you to talk about drugs in any way shape or form. There might be kids reading your stuff and I don’t think they should be exposed to such filth. I personally felt offended by your glorification of marijuana in your newest post and would prefer it if you didn’t mention drugs in your writing anymore. Furthermore, I thought it was pretty tasteless of you to post a picture of a woman with her breast exposed, smoking what appeared to be a joint. Don’t get me wrong, I love your site, but your latest post is disgusting. As a friend I implore you to think about what you put on your site before you do. Others might not be so understanding and will probably stop visiting as a result. I want to see your site grow as a wrestling blog and not be turned into a cesspool for degenerates. I think that if you cleaned up your image a bit and do things like watch your language and steer away from posting nudes and talking about drugs your site can grow and you can get ads put in place. At the end of the day it’s your site and you’re going to do what you want, but I think that if you take my considerations serious that you can become a major player online.

Now, I don’t know if it’s because I’m buzzed from all the beers I’ve been drinking all night or if I’m still fucking high as fuck from the bubonic chronic I was just chiefing on, but that email made me smile. It’s been a while since I’ve gotten that type of response from someone as passionate as Glen. He didn’t come off as a hater and he gave me suggestions on how I should run MY site. How fucking cute is that? Being the ever so charming people’s person that I am, I was going to email Mr. Glenmob62 back and address the situation, but then I realized something:

I really didn’t give a fuck about a damn thing he fucking said. Maybe I would have care just a tiny bit if the motherfucking douchebag would have introduced himself in the comment section, but to email me complaining about content on my site, free content at that, is fucking lame. If someone is not into any risqué kind of topics then why the fuck would they click on a post that’s been clearly labeled NSFW? What the fuck did he think he was going to find after the jump? Sunshine and rainbows? Get the fuck outta here with that bullshit. If a kid stumbles upon this page and is exposed to my Random Nonsense then their parents should hang their heads in shame. I’m not here to be a babysitter. If people don’t like my attitude or the things I write about then arrividerci motherfuckers, don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out. Nobody has a fucking gun to their head forcing them to read my shit. That’s why I don’t get the haters. If you don’t like something, don’t fucking support it. For example, I’m NOT into seeing two men fuck each other up their asses, so why in the hell would I ever visit a gay porn site? Same logic applies here, except there’s no ass fucking involved. I like how Glen also wants this site to grow as a wrestling blog and yet can’t contribute a single comment or article to help move the site in a positive direction. Plus this site can be whatever the fuck I want it to be. It’s not wrestling exclusive, I just happen to really like wrestling so that’s what I mainly write about. If I want to switch things up and give the ladies some pointers on how to properly shave their twats then I can because this is MY fucking site and I run this motherfucker the way I see fit.

I don’t feel like I have to “change my image” because seriously, I don’t have a fucking “image” to begin with. I’m me and that’s all that I can be. You can love me or hate me, that’s your decision. I’m not going to pander to the masses just to get people to like me. When I started this site, I toned down my attitude to be more accessible, but I was still the same motherfucker people seem to love to hate. I don’t feel the need to change at all. If I feel like posting nudes, then I’ll fucking post nudes. Glen wants me to watch my language, but I’m speaking English up in this bitch just like everybody else. If he means the swearing then fuck that motherfucker. I can say SHIT, ASS, BITCH, CUNT, FUCK, FUCKING, MOTHERFUCKING, MOTHERFUCKER, SUCK MY DICK, ASSHOLE, FAGGOT, etc etc if I fucking want to. That’s the joys of living in a free country. FUCK!!! And ads? I don’t need to have some corporate sponsor trying to censor me. What will ads give me anyways? 3 cents per click? What the fuck am I supposed to do with that shit? Who the fuck clicks on ads anyways? Most people on the internet have an ad blocker anyways so you can take your fucking ads, turn them sumbitches sideways and stick them straight up your candy ass, IF YOU SMELL-EL-EL-EL-ELL WHAT THE INFAMOUS JCITY™ IS COOKING!!!

I think I need another beer after that, and guess what? I still don’t give a fuck and to prove it I’m unbanning all trolls!!! Rejoice haters and make sure to suck my motherfucking dick… proverbially speaking of course.

Saturday 7:01 AM – 8:07 AM

The other day someone asked me why I always post music from TKO and if I was interested in posting some of their music. I told that motherfucker I post TKO songs because not only do I fucking feel like it, but I actually like listening to that shit. I then told that bitch that if he had something that was worth my time I would gladly post it. Worse mistake of my fucking life. Within a few hours my Direct Messages on Twitter was flooded with links to the crappiest Down South music I have ever heard. I’m not hating on the South, but by comparison that motherfucker made Soulja Boy sound like the 2nd coming of Rakim. So I did what any normal person in my situation would do, I trashed the music, told him he was wickity wickity wack and blocked his ass so I would never have to be subjected to his constant plugs. Anyways, a few days after WWE’s Royal Rumble PPV, I suggested that TKO go in on a song dissing all types of people in the Music Industry and he did so by putting himself in a lyrical “Royal Rumble” against a bunch of rappers. The end result came out really good. I like the song and thought the beat was dope, but I think he could have gone just a little bit harder. After giving the track a few spins, I decided to go in on some musical acts my damn self. I’m not a rapper, but this is my Music Industry bout to get GOT diss song, check it out:

Lil Wayne’s whole style is gay, have you peeped it?/His jeans are skinnier than anorexics and he buys his under garments from Victoria’s Secret

I laugh when his fans act like they don’t understand why Wayne dresses like a lady/ What the fuck do they expect from a guy that kissed a grown man named Baby?

Lil B named his album “I’m Gay”/ But that much is obvious he sucked like 10 dicks today

Eminem has tons of fans so he is loved and adored/But to me he is a certified fag since he enjoyed Bruno’s balls at the MTV Movie Awards

Sure Adele can sing but to me she’s just a fat hungry bitch/ That would probably give up all her money and fame just for a bite of a sandwich

Jay-Z just had a baby girl, I bet he thinks life is sweet/ But he need to get a DNA test ASAP cuz the real baby daddy is Memphis Bleek

And if it’s really Jay’s kid, damn, I feel so fucking sorry/Cuz that bitch is doomed to grow up looking butt fucking ugly

LL Cool J is a sell out and now acts in NCSI/ his publicist told me that to get that role he had to suck off a Jewish guy/I thought he said “Momma Said Knock You Out”/ So why he gotta put that Jewish dick in his mouth?

Gucci Mane murders people for real and reps the trap/ Too bad his music is fucking wacker than that Ice Cream face tat/ What the fuck was he thinking when he got that shit?/ Master P was already the Ice Cream Man back in 96

Gucci Gucci, Fendi Fendi, Louie Louie, Prada/ Kreayshawn might have her nipples pierced but when it comes to titties she got nada

I can go on and on and on, but like I said before, I’m not a rapper. I’m just having fun with this shit. I told y’all motherfuckers that there was going to be some Random Nonsense up in this bitch and if I do say so myself I think this is turning out to be one of the best posts I have ever put together on this site. I gotta go though, so I’ll check y’all later. Peace fuckers.

Saturday 10:011 PM – 10:23 PM

In damn this bitch was just irrelevant 24 hours ago, but now that she’s dead I’m supposed to pretend to give a fuck news, Whitney Houston died at the age of 48. Seeing as I was never a fan of her music or her crappy ass movies, I can give a fuck less about this news. Whitney Houston, to me at least, will always be nothing more than a cracked out drug fiend. I’m surprised she even lived to be 48 because I could have sworn this bitch died like 5 years ago from a drug overdose. I bet she saw the light at the end of the tunnel, thought it was a massive crack rock, and ran straight towards her demise like the stupid bitch I always suspected her to be. Bobby Brown must be devastated right now. I’m sure he’s going to smoke and sniff massive amounts of drugs tonight in her memory, but I don’t feel sorry for him, I feel sorry for her drug dealer. What is he to do now? His cash cow hit the bucket so now he’s fucked. Whatever, I wasted enough time talking about this stupid hoe. Yada, yada, yada, rest in peace bitch.

Sunday 12:59 AM – 1:15 AM

So, being the inconsiderate asshole that I am, I took to Twitter to troll Whitney Houston fans give my thoughts on the death of Whitney Houston. What ended up happening was completely fucking hilarious; people were fucking pissed off and tried their best to insult me, I ended up getting alot of re-tweets in the process and over 75 people unfollowed my ass. That’s ok though because I really don’t give a fuck if people follow me on Twitter or not. While they were getting mad at me like they knew the bitch personally and shit, I was just sitting back laughing my fucking ass off. Anyways, I don’t know how to take Twitter screenshots so I decided to copy and paste my tweets here for your reading amusement and/or hatred.

I guess I’m the only one that doesn’t give a fuck about Whitney Houston dying… it was a long time coming due to her crackhead ways #SuckIt

Whitney Houston is now in hell where she belongs licking a million motherfucking cocks per second… FOR CRACK!!!!!

Whitney Houston is getting fucked in the ass by Osama Bin Laden… IN HELL!!!!!

Bobby Brown is crying like a bitch because he had an 8ball stashed up Whitney Houston’s asshole and now he can’t get it back until the autopsy

The same people who unfollowed me because of what I said about Whitney are the same people who illegally download her music #Hypocrites

Whitney Houston overdosed on jizz and cocaine RIP whore

Fake ass people shit on a person when they are alive then turn around and praise them after they’re dead #FuckWhitneyHouston

R.I.P Whitney Houston you haven’t been relevant all decade but suddenly we’re supposed to care #FuckOuttaHereWithThatBullshit

The Bodyguard was wack and just for that Whitney Houston’s death was long over due

Ray J killed Whitney Houston with the aids he got from Kim Kardashian

Why should I show Whitney Houston respect? She was a fucking CRACkHEAD!!!

I’m going to cook up some crack rocks, kill myself and go to hell just so I could have Whitney Houston suck my dick for crack

Whitney Houston fans are a bunch of emotional twats

Tonight Whitney Houston will sniff a line of coke off Satan’s dick

I’m about to take a shit in the memory of Whitney Houston BRB

So I took a shit in the name of Whitney Houston and it stunk and got flushed down the toilet just like her career 🙂

Ok, I’m done with the Whitney Houston tweets the bitch isn’t worthy of anymore of my time

Sunday 8:24 AM – 9:21 AM

So, I’m watching the latest episode of Jersey Shore that I had saved on my DVR (don’t you dare fucking judge me) and have come to the conclusion that MIKE “THE SITUATION” SORRENTINO IS THE MOST UNMANLIEST MAN IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND!!! His whole style and demeanor is similar to that of a 16-year-old teenage girl. He loves to gossip, starts unnecessary drama, is extremely hormonal as if nothing but estrogen is flowing through his veins and he throws little bitch fits in order to get attention. Then there’s the whole tanning thing, his love for shopping and obsession with shaving every hair on his body that just screams faggot to me. If he isn’t gay then he’s certainly bisexual. I know a fag when I see one and “The Situation” is one Chiquita Banana away from a full-blown fruit basket. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not hating on gay people. If a man wants to suck another man’s dick and hide salami logs up his ass then that’s his fucking business, but what I don’t respect is a fake motherfucker like “The Situation” that goes out of his way to seem like a real man when it’s apparent that he’s one of the most feminine motherfuckers alive right now. All I’m saying is that if he is indeed gay, he might as well come out the fucking closet and own that shit. Can you image how funny it would be if he got into an argument with Snooki and he ends up putting her in her place with one hand on his hips while he snaps his fingers with his other hand in a queer like motion? That would be funny as fuck and I know deep down inside “The Situation” would love to be able to do that.

I think the reason he stays in the closet is because he doesn’t want to be judged and he fears the reaction he would get from all of the other guys on the Jersey Shore so he keeps his gayness a secret, but the more I see him on TV, the more I see a rainbow emanating from his body, dying to bust out. If he keeps it up, I fear that he will end up disintegrating into a big pile of Skittles and glitter for the whole world to see on MTV. People can call me a hater, but the proof is right in front of their eyes. For starters, every time I see this dude in the club he is always drinking fruity little drinks like Appletinis and Cosmos. A real man will always go for a beer and some shots, but “The Situation” likes his drinks to have an umbrella in them and if that’s not a sign then I don’t know what is. Then there’s the fact that he cock blocks every other guy in the Jersey Shore house. Every time someone is trying to kick game to a bitch he always comes out of nowhere and fucks it up for them. In order to keep up his appearance as a straight man, he usually ends up bringing the chicks back home after pulling the robbery, but if you pay attention, he barely ever gets laid. Something always happens that ends up fucking up his sexual conquests. Most times he sabotages his dates on purpose, but why would a straight man do that? They wouldn’t, but “The Situation” would because he prefers cock and balls to vagina any day. Don’t believe me? Fine, but why in the hell did he give his best friend the nickname “The Unit” after being impressed with the size of his dick? That’s some gay shit right there.

Sometimes I wonder why the fuck I even watch Jersey Shore and then I remember why… I FUCKING LOVE J WOWW!!!! Deena to me is hot skanky mess. I can literally see the Gonorrhea emanating from her body. Snooki lost alot of weight lately and looks fuckable, but everybody done hit that (allegedly even Jersey Shore’s resident fudge packer hit that too) and she just comes off as an airheaded bimbo and I hate airheaded bimbos. J WoWW though is sexy as fuck. He has the look of a MILF with the breast of a Goddess and her body is fucking banging. She’s also the least slutty of all the bitches in the house even though see looks like the biggest freak of them all. Don’t get me wrong, I love slutty bitches, but I don’t respect them. The less whorish a woman comes off as, the more attracted I am to them. With Deena and Snooki I would just try to bust a nut on their eagerly awaiting faces and be off that, but with J WoWW I would take my time and fully enjoy her body. I’m getting an erection just thinking about fucking her so on that note I’ll catch y’all later.

Sunday 1:19 Pm – 1:40 PM

Damn, I’ve gotten a ton of backlash for my commentary on the life and death of Whitney Houston. From the fallout on Twitter, to my flooded email inbox, to comments on this very site, it seems that the things I’ve said really pissed alot of people off. Some have demanded that I either take down what I wrote or issue an apology and to those people I say FUCK YOU!!! I said what I meant and I meant what I said. If you didn’t like my opinion then good, difference of opinions are part of life. Attacking me because of what I said is no better than me shitting all over the death of a celebrity though. A celebrity you didn’t even know personally at that. It’s ok, I think they sell some ointment for that butt hurt. I understand why people are mad though. It all stems down to the lack of respect I showed to the deceased because people are programmed to give a fuck about those that passed away even if those feelings are superficial as fuck. With that being said, I’m going to learn from this experience and show respect to the dead no matter what they did when they were alive or if I agreed with the things they did when they were among the living. Looking back at high profile deaths, I decided to show Hitler the respect people think I should show someone just because they died. Here goes nothing… I respect Hitler because of his dedication to his people and his work. I respect Hitler because he was a visionary. I respect Hitler because he was passionate when it came to his goal of creating a superior race. I respect Hitler for having the balls to mass murder a whole race of people in order to meet said goal. I respect Hitler because he wasn’t afraid to push and cross boundaries in order to get things done. I respect Hitler not because I respected anything he ever did when he was alive, but because he’s dead now so I must show respect according to everyone I’ve come in contact with in the last 18 hours. So, respect Hitler now or die victims of your own goddamn hypocrisy.

HAIL HITLER!!!!!

________

On that note I think I should just bring this to a close. This shit is already clocking in at over 7,500 words and I don’t think I could write a more powerful ending than that. I would consider “Random Nonsense” to be a success. I made some people laugh while making others cry. I brought happiness to some and anger to most. This post was both loved and hated at the same time and that is something not too many people can pull off. Thanks for reading.

Oh and before I forget… FUCK WHITNEY HOUSTON!!!!

*Fades2Black*

  1. Capt. Smooth
    February 10, 2012 at 5:52 am

    I’ll be up like that too and it’s usually when I’m on vacation. I’ll go to sleep around 12 or 1 and wake and won’t be able to go back to bed at anywhere from 2 to 4. It sucks!

    Interesting idea for a column!

    • February 10, 2012 at 8:07 am

      I can stay up for days at a time sometimes. Maybe I should invest in some Nyquil, but knowing me I would probably try to make some bootleg lean off that, lol.

      This already turned out to be a full length column and it just fucking started, but it will go ALL WEEKEND LONG!!!!

      • Capt. Smooth
        February 10, 2012 at 6:38 pm

        Try watching an Otunga match.

  2. February 10, 2012 at 8:26 am

    You posted this column at 3:53 AM. Your first update was at 5:09 AM. What did you do for an hour?

    • Capt. Smooth
      February 10, 2012 at 6:38 pm

      You don’t want to know. 🙂

      • February 10, 2012 at 7:43 pm

        Fist update was started at 4:09 AM and posted at 4:20 AM.

        Wait… how do you know this was originally posted at 3:53 AM? I don’t even know that.

  3. TKO
    February 10, 2012 at 9:40 am

    man, i been working the graveyard shift this week and it affected my natural sleep habits,up all night,i rewrote some songs,watched scarface.tried to get some late night hand action but her fuckin stupid ass dog cocked blocked me so they cuddled.i started to doze and hada brief dream about velvet sky cuz i actually watched a lil tna.random indeed. dont forget to check out that royal rumble joint at youtube.com/tikayoh3000

    • February 10, 2012 at 7:47 pm

      Should have put peanut butter on your balls and had the dog lick it off, lol. Kidding, unless you’re into that thing then more power to you. I haven’t watched TNA yet. I’ll get to it eventually. I’ll be sure to check out Royal Rumble later on tonight. .

  4. Rob
    February 10, 2012 at 10:01 am

    This is a great idea. If I could offer a suggestion it would be to split up the days since this might end up being very long. I think this would work good as a daily thing if you ever get writers block. It feels sorta like a running diary. I like how each entry has the date and time too. I used to stay up all night but know my schedule is fixed due to my new job. The story about the first time you smoked weed was great. I laughed at Mr. Swinky and Lisa Ann looks fantastic. Can’t wait to read the rest.

    • February 10, 2012 at 7:52 pm

      Doing this daily on a slow day isn’t a bad idea, but I doubt I would commit to it. I did it this way because even though my eye is no longer red as the devils dick, my vision is a bit blurry at the moment so I have to write in short bits and pieces. This allows me to put together a proper length column while providing myself the convenience of only writing a little bit at a time. Glad you like it.

  5. Devastating David
    February 10, 2012 at 8:05 pm

    That was interesting. I started smoking tree back in 94 right after I got outta the Navy! I grew up with it so I knew what I was getting into I just didn’t know how much I would grow to depend on it. Don’t trip bruh I love raves too and the bitches that attend them.

    • February 10, 2012 at 10:28 pm

      Weed is the plant of life. It says so in the Bible and every Bible page in the world is made out of rolling papers.

  6. February 10, 2012 at 8:22 pm

    Ahahaha, this is awesome idea JCITY dude! I got a good laugh out that first weed paragraph too, lolz.

    his Jeremy Lin, omg bros! Oh, and I found out my grandmother is a homosexual.

  7. February 10, 2012 at 10:30 pm

    Who the fuck is Jeremy Lin? And your grandmother is gay? LMMFAO. WTF…

    • February 10, 2012 at 10:38 pm

      Isn’t Jeremy Lin the new savior of the New York Knicks? Amare who?

      • February 10, 2012 at 11:28 pm

        Asians suck at basketball. Just saying.

        Nevermind, I guess this Jeremy Lin is pretty good and is a Harvard graduate to boot. Still, I bet he has a little dick so I win HAHAHAHAHAHA.

        • Capt. Smooth
          February 11, 2012 at 11:07 am

          Lin is like the new Tebow, but he appears to be good.

          • February 11, 2012 at 12:13 pm

            Does Lin give praise to Jesus after each win? Oh wait…he doesn’t because the Knicks never win.

            • Capt. Smooth
              February 11, 2012 at 4:44 pm

              He is a bigtime Christian though.

              • February 11, 2012 at 10:29 pm

                Knicks beat the Lakers just the other day. Then again Lakers suck this year. And an Asian Christian? That’s an oxymoron.

  8. Stephen
    February 10, 2012 at 11:14 pm

    This is stupid. Nobody cares about your drug problems or your stupid Smackdown review. No need to continue this post. Just quit while you’re ahead.

  9. Rob
    February 11, 2012 at 10:36 am

    Wow, this post just tripled in size since the last time I checked in.

    • Capt. Smooth
      February 11, 2012 at 11:08 am

      That’s what she said.

  10. TKO
    February 11, 2012 at 10:50 am

    haha i didnt go it but it was a fun start….you got me though,u really dont give a fuck,you went in. i hate when a lame rapper cant see he sux,shame.i wonder who he is cuz i might could really go in on a hater with a face,bitch come to omaha and ask about me.save that southern shit to t.i. and jezzy.and fuck glen,this site aint for kids and you should change shit.

    • February 11, 2012 at 10:33 pm

      I get a bunch of wack rappers trying to send me stuff on Twitter. I won’t just post any ‘ol bullshit. I have to actually believe in what I’m pushing. That little diss rap was fun, I might remix it and make it longer in the future. Fuck Glenmob62.

  11. Capt. Smooth
    February 11, 2012 at 11:10 am

    LOL at those Jay-Z baby pics!

    And chubby or not, I want to fuck Adele’s voice.

    • February 11, 2012 at 10:34 pm

      I would stick my dick in her blow hole. I know she has one, the bitch is the size of a baby whale.

  12. Black Metal Death Metal
    February 11, 2012 at 11:23 am

    This is incredible mate. Love the personal stories mixed in with a Smackdown review and everything else. The rap at the end was great. You should make a song with TKO it would be cracking mate.

    • February 11, 2012 at 10:37 pm

      Glad you enjoyed it. I don’t think the world is ready for another song by me, but I was thinking about doing a live radio show on BlogTalkRadio or something.

  13. Devastating David
    February 11, 2012 at 3:41 pm

    Dawg that was the funniest muthafuckin shit I ever fuckin read. Fuck I had to read it to my broad. The email by Glen and the response was classic. This shit is dope keep it up homey!

    • February 11, 2012 at 10:43 pm

      Have to thank TKO for the inspiration because if it wasn’t for the Royal Rumble joint I would have never dissed any of those motherfuckers, lol. As for Glen, maybe I should take his suggestions into consideration. I’LL GET ADS!!!! Lol.

  14. Case
    February 11, 2012 at 9:31 pm

    Good shit homie. This is like 5 blogs in one. Long ass read but since the topics keep changing up it doesn’t get boring. The Smackdown review throws it off a little but damn did you ever go in on that email response and the rap was too fucking funny and those pics are classic.

    • February 11, 2012 at 10:48 pm

      The thought of splitting everything up into it’s own post did cross my mind, but I don’t think it’s hard to just skip the stuff you already read and scroll down to the new shit. I like trying new blog ideas and so far so good I would say. I might do this again sometime soon.

      New Whitney Houston is dead update.

  15. Capt. Smooth
    February 12, 2012 at 12:07 am

    Lame Whitney update.

    RIP
    Thank you, Whitney.

    And remember…

    • February 12, 2012 at 12:14 am

      How is it lame? Why are you thanking her for? What has she ever done for you?

      If you thought that was bad then don’t click this link because I went H.A.M on Twitter, lol:

      https://twitter.com/#!/D_3VIL_JCITY

      • Capt. Smooth
        February 12, 2012 at 12:16 am

        She gave me plenty of good music that will live on with or without her.

        • February 12, 2012 at 12:26 am

          I was never into her stuff. All I knew was Whitney Houston the crackhead.

          • Devastating David
            February 12, 2012 at 4:46 am

            Truth is I’m not surprised about Whitney. Actually the only thing that surprised me about the whole thin I’m surprised Bobby outlived her. I got 1000 that says Lindsey Lohan is next. Either her or her father.

            • February 12, 2012 at 9:32 am

              I thought he would die before her too and my money is on DMX being next.

              • Capt. Smooth
                February 12, 2012 at 11:10 am

                Yeah, Bobby still being around does shock me. He might’ve turned his life around, because I just read that New Edition was coming to Louisville in the future for a show.

                • February 12, 2012 at 12:43 pm

                  There’s this homeless guy that always stands in from of 7/11 that claims to be a former backup dancer for New Edition. I always make him dance for some change. It’s fucking hilarious.

  16. February 12, 2012 at 1:25 am

    Honestly, I don’t give a ahaha about Whitney Houston. When you choose to do drugs, you know the consequences of them and you accept them. Don’t like the consequences, do not do the drugs.

    And it’s funny how Ray J found her body. That dude gets in the news for everything except for his music, lololol.

  17. Lee
    February 12, 2012 at 6:40 am

    Damn, you’re fucking crazy dude. This post is just a rollercoaster of emotions. Some parts are funny while others make me want to reach through my screen and strangle you. The Whitney Houston part was not only over the top but it was over the line. Maybe Glen was right.

    • February 12, 2012 at 9:36 am

      I never liked Whitney Houston so why am I going to pretend that I give a shit about her? To me she was just a crackhead and crackheads are the lowest of the low (right up there with child molesters and rapists) when it comes to human existence. Why should I show a crackhead respect after they died when I never did it when they were alive? I’m not suddenly gonna jump on a bandwagon just because of a death. That’s what fake bitches do.

      Oh and fuck Glen.

      • Capt. Smooth
        February 12, 2012 at 11:13 am

        If you “never cared about her”, then don’t say anything.

        • February 12, 2012 at 12:48 pm

          I said I never liked the bitch, but why would that stop me from having an opinion on her death? It’s not a crime to be negative towards a celebrity dying. Just like everyone making jokes about Michael Jackson when he was alive and then he died and those same people did a 180 and claimed to be lifelong fans that loved his music and supported him through his hardships. Hypocrites.

          • Capt. Smooth
            February 12, 2012 at 4:14 pm

            I call bullshit. And please don’t fall back on “having an opinion”. It’s pathetic.

            A wise man once said, “Opinions are like assholes. Everybody has one and most of them stink.”.

            • February 12, 2012 at 4:30 pm

              What I’m saying is true though. I’m being logical about the situation. If you didn’t like someone in life doesn’t mean you should praise them in death only because they died. Pathetic is feeling or better yet claiming to be sympathetic about a person you never felt sympathy to begin with. Just like you think my opinion might stink, I can think your opinion on my opinion stinks worse therefore the opinions cancel each other out.

              • Capt. Smooth
                February 12, 2012 at 4:35 pm

                Then, what’s the point of an opinion in the first place? I do have sympathy, not because I think she was a victim, but because I’ve seen people struggle with drugs and not be able to get over that hump.

                • February 12, 2012 at 4:44 pm

                  I have too, but drugs aren’t the only issue here I just never got her appeal and could care less about her entire career or the fact that she’s now dead. I’m free to voice that opinion just like your free to disagree.

                  • Capt. Smooth
                    February 12, 2012 at 4:52 pm

                    That’s a lame reason to trash somebody. I can’t stand country music, but I’m not gonna trash Garth Brooks if he were to die.

                    • February 12, 2012 at 4:58 pm

                      Garth Brooks isn’t a massive failure in life though.

  18. Anon
    February 12, 2012 at 9:37 am

    You’re a horrible human being.

  19. Anon
    February 12, 2012 at 9:40 am

    Just because you’re an insensitive monster doesn’t mean other people cant mourn. You cried like a bitch when the patriots lost, but when someone dies you make fun of people for having emotions? Its called empathy. You need to grow up.

    • February 12, 2012 at 9:42 am

      Lmmfao. Suck my balls bitch.

      • Capt. Smooth
        February 12, 2012 at 11:14 am

        Nice point on The Patriots.

        • February 12, 2012 at 12:50 pm

          I’m positive I said fuck the Patriots and Tom Brady too so I don’t see how that’s even a valid point.

          • Capt. Smooth
            February 12, 2012 at 4:17 pm

            It’s that you(and many fans) get so worked up over a game, but are cold and trash somebody who did NOTHING to you the very day they die. Houston will be known for her talent way more than any drug issues.

            • February 12, 2012 at 4:33 pm

              Patriots >>> Whitney Houston

              • Capt. Smooth
                February 12, 2012 at 4:37 pm

                Whitney Houston>>>Giants>>>Patriots

                • February 12, 2012 at 4:41 pm

                  Lol, yeah right.

                  • Capt. Smooth
                    February 12, 2012 at 4:53 pm

                    Well, it should be this.

                    Kentucky Wildcats>>>all others.

                    • February 12, 2012 at 4:59 pm

                      Lol, the only good thing to come out of Kentucky is it’s fried chicken.

  20. February 12, 2012 at 9:43 am

    Lee = Glen.

  21. February 12, 2012 at 9:49 am

    Honestly dudes… I haven’t watched a single Jersey Shore episode since the premier this year. I think the run is nearing it’s end bros. Most people are moving on. It’s like the Hills when Lauren Conrad left. It wasn’t the same after that. I know Vinny is back, but now it’s like we’ve seen it all before, ahaha.

    • February 12, 2012 at 9:57 am

      I heard that they are working on an all Black and an all Hispanic type of Jersey Shore show. If it’s true then I hope the Black version is super stereotypical because it would be the greatest show ever, but being on MTV people will view it as racist. Still I would love to see that, but it won’t be realistic because MTV doesn’t show people smoking weed. Not even on The Real World. Like serious not one person smokes weed? Lol. If they do the Hispanic show they should go with Mexicans and make that one super stereotypical too. Or stick 4 Puerto Ricans in a house with 4 Dominicans. All hell would break loose.

      I would love to see the Jersey Shore cast on Fear Factor. Make them drink a gallon of donkey semen and I bet you “The Situation” will drink it all in one big gulp and win.

  22. February 12, 2012 at 12:52 pm

    I can’t imagine what would happen if someone like Justin Bieber went on a Twitter rant about Whitney Houston.

    • February 12, 2012 at 1:32 pm

      Ahaha, he would never do that, but if he did, it would end his career.

      • February 12, 2012 at 1:43 pm

        I don’t think it would end his career at all. All of his fans will say how much of a bad ass he is for saying it. People that are infatuated with celebrities seem to act like brainwashed zombies, especially on Twitter, but if I say it everyone is coming at me with the pitchforks.

        HAIL HITLER!

        • February 12, 2012 at 8:44 pm

          The media would go crazy if this happened…

          @justinbieber Latest Tweets:

          love my big bros @kennyhamilton and @usherraymondiv – had a real talk last night. #FAMILY
          2:00 PM – 12 Feb 12 via web

          Watch @TheGRAMMYs tonight. BORN TO BE SOMEBODY is nominated for ‘Best Song Written For a Movie’ Let’s do it @Diane_Warren . #NEVERSAYNEVER
          2:05 PM – 12 Feb 12 via web

          Whitney Houston is dead. I hate that bitch. #Cokehead
          2:10 PM – 12 Feb 12 via web

          • February 12, 2012 at 9:18 pm

            JTFO! That would be too funny!

            • February 13, 2012 at 12:31 am

              If Justin Bieber were to the Twitter fallout that would ensue would be 100 times worse than with Whitney Houston.

  23. February 12, 2012 at 2:14 pm

    lol, JCITY dude going for the ultimate heel status.

    • February 12, 2012 at 4:37 pm

      Lol, I never expected or meant for this post to turn out this way, but like Kane says, EMBRACE THE HATE!!!!!

  24. Rob
    February 12, 2012 at 3:11 pm

    I don’t even know what to say right now. I’m speechless.

  25. Stephen
    February 12, 2012 at 3:41 pm

    So JCITY is a Nazi now?

    • February 12, 2012 at 4:40 pm

      Just showing respect to the greatest man that ever lived because that’s what the people would want me to do.

      HAIL HITLER!!!!!

  26. Capt. Smooth
    February 12, 2012 at 4:25 pm

    Whatever it is, it’s fucked up logic.

    Actually, what I’m hearing now is that she drowned in her bathtub. She did have a Xanax(and she has a prescription for them) like she usually has to calm her nerves before a show and was said to be in good spirits. The Xanax could’ve mixed with a drink she had while at a bar the night before. It’s odd. The more subtle dosage can kill somebody easier than trying to OD. If you take too much, your body will reject it and you’ll puke it back up.

    • February 12, 2012 at 4:47 pm

      It’s only fucked up to you because you don’t agree with it. That doesn’t necessarily mean I’m wrong, because I’m not. If she died by drowning in a bathtub because she took anxiety pills then that’s fucking hilarious to me. A drug overdose would have been a more fitting way to go out.

      • Capt. Smooth
        February 12, 2012 at 4:59 pm

        No, it’s fucked up. No wonder you like heels so much.

        And it was likely an overdose(accidental) with a drink and the Xanax. Nothing more.

        And the way she died is not funny(if that’s the case). That’s just psychopathic. Sorry, but it is.

        • February 12, 2012 at 5:14 pm

          To die in a bathtub by not cutting your wrists is an epic fail.

          • Capt. Smooth
            February 12, 2012 at 5:18 pm

            No, it’s sad. To just have the wrong combo of stuff in your body and not be able to lift yourself out of that tub is a horrible way to go.

            • February 12, 2012 at 5:26 pm

              She’s a seasoned user of hard illicit drugs, I doubt that a Xanax and alcohol combo could have done that to her. I suspect foul play, but of course the media will cover it up. Her death might just be an Illuminati ritual. Tun Tun Tun…

  27. Capt. Smooth
    February 12, 2012 at 5:04 pm

    THE INFAMOUS JCITY™ :
    Garth Brooks isn’t a massive failure in life though.

    Neither is she. She will be more remembered for her talent than her drug issue. Fact, not opinion.

    • February 12, 2012 at 5:12 pm

      From all the stuff I read she’s more remembered for her drug issues and by this time next year nobody is going to give a fuck about her… until her movie with Jordin Sparks comes out then fake wannabe fans are going to jump on the bandwagon like the fake ass dick riders that they are.

      • Capt. Smooth
        February 12, 2012 at 5:14 pm

        Her music>>>her drug issue.

        • February 12, 2012 at 5:22 pm

          She hasn’t made any relevant music in years, but she’s lucky that she died so close to the Grammy’s because now they’re going to give her a tribute. I guess she managed to do something right after all. I wouldn’t be surprise if this was all planned. If she was just ready to let it all go as long as her legend lived on. It would explain why she’s in a new movie coming out and why she died so close to the Grammy’s. It’s a fucking conspiracy to make people over look her drug issues.

          • Capt. Smooth
            February 13, 2012 at 5:55 am

            J. “Cole” City

            • February 13, 2012 at 11:15 am

              J. Cole is soft, JCITY™ goes harder than a motherfucker.

              • Capt. Smooth
                February 13, 2012 at 8:07 pm

                Remember, if it goes “harder” formore than 4 hours, call a doctor.

                • February 14, 2012 at 4:54 am

                  Lmmfao. Good one.

                  • Capt. Smooth
                    February 14, 2012 at 5:51 am

                    Well, the thing is I wouldn’t be calling the doctor, I’d be calling everybody!

                    • February 14, 2012 at 6:49 am

                      Break out the little black book for that one. Bitches love hard dick.

  28. Capt. Smooth
    February 12, 2012 at 5:05 pm

    THE INFAMOUS JCITY™ :
    Lol, the only good thing to come out of Kentucky is it’s fried chicken.

    What about me? 😦

    • February 12, 2012 at 5:15 pm

      Lol. You know what I mean.

      • Capt. Smooth
        February 12, 2012 at 5:19 pm

        You meant it! I can see it in your e-eyes. lol

        • February 12, 2012 at 5:28 pm

          Speaking of eyes I think I might have to get glasses soon.

          • Capt. Smooth
            February 13, 2012 at 5:56 am

            How many fingers am I holding up?

            • February 13, 2012 at 11:18 am

              One.

              • Capt. Smooth
                February 13, 2012 at 8:08 pm

                No, two. lol

                • February 14, 2012 at 4:55 am

                  And they both seem to be pointing out from the middle of your hands… BASTARD!!!!

                  • Capt. Smooth
                    February 14, 2012 at 5:52 am

                    No, my left ring finger and my right index finger. You DO need glasses!

                    • February 14, 2012 at 6:53 am

                      Lol, damn maybe I do. I’m starting to see better though. Slow healing I guess.

  29. Capt. Smooth
    February 12, 2012 at 5:12 pm

    THE INFAMOUS JCITY™ :
    Kim Jong and Bin Laden, while being villains in the eyes of Americans, did good by their people. Whitney Houston never did anything for anyone other than herself. They had a method to their madness, she was just an idiot who blew all her money on her own self destruction.

    Please do a column about that.

    • February 12, 2012 at 5:17 pm

      Lmmfao. I don’t think that would be a good idea.

      • Capt. Smooth
        February 12, 2012 at 5:20 pm

        exactly

  30. February 12, 2012 at 5:27 pm

    But it’s true though.

    • Capt. Smooth
      February 13, 2012 at 5:57 am

      Then why wouldn’t it be a “good idea”?

      • February 13, 2012 at 11:19 am

        I don’t want to make it a habit of bashing Whitney Houston. I said what I said no need to drag it out in another post.

        • Capt. Smooth
          February 13, 2012 at 8:09 pm

          Yeah, you don’t want an addiction.

          • February 14, 2012 at 4:57 am

            Or do I? Matt Hardy makes them seem like so much fun.

            • Capt. Smooth
              February 14, 2012 at 5:53 am

              Try it, maybe you’ll like it. All the cool kids are doing it.

  31. February 12, 2012 at 5:35 pm

    This was the GOAT blog dudes.

    • February 12, 2012 at 5:44 pm

      I think it’s Top 5 for sure. Covered lots of topic and it ended up giving me that old vibe from therealshyt.com

      I would like to thank Whitney Houston for croaking because that just added the cherry on top of an already awesome blog even though the Twitterverse hates my guts now, lol.

      Maybe it’s time I reclaimed the title of The AntiChrist.

      HAIL HITLER… AND SATAN!!!!

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  32. Booker T
    February 12, 2012 at 8:18 pm

    OH MY GOODNESS!

  33. February 12, 2012 at 8:33 pm

    I saw Attack The Block last night. Good movie.

    • February 13, 2012 at 12:36 am

      I didn’t think I would like it as much as I did, but it’s pretty good. If you can, watch the extra features.

      • February 14, 2012 at 8:17 pm

        I saw it for free on Starz.

        • February 15, 2012 at 6:18 am

          It’s not available on Starz where I’m at. Maybe it was Showtime or something.

  34. February 12, 2012 at 8:38 pm

    Alan :
    Ahaha, he would never do that, but if he did, it would end his career.

    It’s just funny imagining if Justin Bieber wrote the exact same tweets JCITY wrote (including the “The next celebrity I want to see dead hmmm… give me Justin Bieber or Beyonce” tweet). People would automatically assume his Twitter was hacked. Bieber could say the next day, “Some1 hacked my Twitter! Nooooo!” and everyone would believe him. Bieber can say whatever he wants and then just say he was hacked.

    • February 12, 2012 at 8:53 pm

      Ahaha yeah, that’s true. His fans are all 13 year old girls so they wouldn’t have the brains to analyze the situation anyways, lololol.

      • February 12, 2012 at 9:02 pm

        His girl fans would be spending all day looking for the “hacker”. Bieber should create an alter-ego.

        • February 13, 2012 at 12:38 am

          Bieber can kill a bunch of people and rape a few children and his fans would still love him because they are brainwashed.

  35. February 12, 2012 at 8:55 pm

    KANYE WITH 19 GRAMMYS! I love that dude, aha!

    Man, Jay Z and Kanye are going to send Wayne home crying tonight, ahaha.

    • February 13, 2012 at 12:47 am

      His 2010 album should not have been in contention in a 2012 Grammy show and 19 Grammys? I read he only won 4. Haben’t watched it yet. Had to DVR so I could catch the return of The Walking Dead that way I can fast forward all the wack parts, especially the Whitney Houston tribute, lol.

      • February 13, 2012 at 4:52 pm

        19 grammys through his whole career, lol. He was only nominated for like 7 last night. But yeah, ahaha, I’m glad he won and not Wayne.

        • February 14, 2012 at 5:00 am

          The Carter 4 was a disappointment. I’m surprised they didn’t nominate Tyler The Creator for best new artist though.

  36. Devastating David
    February 12, 2012 at 9:42 pm

    Damn bruh that’s how u feel? I can kinda feel u about the people putting Celebes on a pedestal but you went a little hard core with the Hitler thing..

    • February 13, 2012 at 1:02 am

      I was being a sarcastic asshole with the whole Hitler thing since everyone thinks I should show respect to the dead. So am I wrong for praising Hitler? Maybe I am maybe I’m not, but if they called me out on it they would look like hypocrites hence the sound of crickets when it comes to that section of the blog because even though people think I’m wrong, I’m actually right. I just checkmated all of their asses with that shit.

      HAIL HITLER!!! Lmmfao. HEIL!!!

      • Anon
        February 13, 2012 at 12:01 pm

        You didn’t put anybody in checkmate. You’re a delusional moron. People aren’t commenting because like 4 people read this blog.

        Enjoy being a nobody.

        • February 13, 2012 at 12:10 pm

          You’re the delusional one. I’m read in over 170 countries and have hundreds of readers jackass. Step up your trolling because you obviously don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about. Plus I don’t ever have to blog again and I’ll still be popular elsewhere. Check and mate. Thanks for reading asshole.

  37. Bobby Brown
    February 13, 2012 at 3:35 am

    You’re a disgusting human being. Have you no shame? I hope you die and rot in hell.

  38. Black Metal Death Metal
    February 13, 2012 at 4:15 am

    Call me crazy but I thought the rant on Whitney Houston and the ending with the whole glorification of Hitler was bloody hilarious mate. Very ballsy move on your part to write such things even though the Whitney hoopla is taking away from great sections like the one about Valentines Day and the Jersey Shore bloke. All around excellent blog. Hope you bring this format back soon. Cheers.

    • Capt. Smooth
      February 13, 2012 at 5:59 am

      Classy>>>ballsy!

      • February 13, 2012 at 11:24 am

        I might just take out the Valentine’s Day stuff and repost it tomorrow if anything.

        Capt, when have I ever been classy? Lol.

        • Capt. Smooth
          February 13, 2012 at 8:11 pm

          It’s a good time to start. *types this while doing a nasty fart*

          • February 14, 2012 at 5:02 am

            Lol. I tried to be classy, didn’t work, back to being an ass.

            • Capt. Smooth
              February 14, 2012 at 5:54 am

              Class vs. Ass: The debate continues!

  39. Capt. Smooth
    February 14, 2012 at 7:21 pm

    THE INFAMOUS JCITY™ :
    Break out the little black book for that one. Bitches love hard dick.

    I thought they liked softies. No wonder I’m in a rut.

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