Home > THE INFAMOUS JCITY™, WrestleMania 28, WWE, WWE PPV Preview > This Be A Wrestle Fuckin’ Mania 28 PPV Preview… BITCH!!!!!!

This Be A Wrestle Fuckin’ Mania 28 PPV Preview… BITCH!!!!!!

This Be A Wrestle Fuckin’ Mania 28 PPV Preview… BITCH!!!!!!

by THE INFAMOUS JCITY™

After taking a big warm creamy shit all over the memory of Alan/Hell Gator and uppercutting the resurrection of the shittiest website known to man, XRWB, straight to the depths of hell (while taking a piss on the brand the whole time it plunged into its new fiery home) it’s time to get back to your regularly scheduled program. If you learned anything from that little site distraction it should be that you really don’t want to fucking piss me the fuck off. All that’s gonna happen is that I’m going to end up taking your ass to school and then I’m gonna to embarrass your ass by pulling off a Columbine type massacre up in this bitch. Fuck all that though, that’s the past and this is the motherfuckin’ present, and in the present I have to deal with motherfuckers asking me why I haven’t had any WrestleMania 28 related coverage on the site.

For starters, I’m not a fucking WWE hype machine. If they can’t do a good job in selling me on ordering WrestleMania 28 on April 1st then why the fuck should I care about the event? There’s plenty of sites out there covering the PPV, even going as far as having WrestleMania themed months and/or WrestleMania Week, like some groupie ass bitches, so why are people harassing me for MY thoughts on the PPV? Fuck it though, y’all want WrestleMania, I’m going to give y’all bitches Wrestle Fuckin’ Mania so you motherfuckers can stop flooding my motherfucking email asking me stupid WrestleMania 28 related bullshit. Be warned, I really don’t feel like writing about stupid ass wrestling right now, so I’m just going to reach deep down in the crevice of my asscrack and pull out a WrestleMania 28 preview (proverbially speaking of course) and if it doesn’t meet your precious high standards of IWC literature then fuck you very much bitch. Let’s get this motherfucker started, shall we? #Hypothetical…

Randy Orton vs Kane ~ The token “We have about 10 minutes to fill so let’s pull a random match out of our collective asses and see if it works” WrestleMania match. I really don’t give a fuck about this match, but if I have to pick a winner I’ll go with Orton since Kane is now regulated to midcard bullshit after being the most entertaining part of WWE during the first few months of the year. Fuck John Cena for killing Kane’s momentum and fuck this stupid ass match.

Winner: Randy Orton

Team Teddy vs Team Johhny ~ Is it me or is every single African-American performer in the WWE participating in this match? It sure as hell seems that way to me. Someone forgot to tell Vince McMahon that Black History Month is in February, not April. I’m surprised this ain’t a fucking Ladder Match with a big ass bucket of Fried Chicken and a lifetime supply of grape soda as the prize (sign me the fuck up!). If all the white guys in this match come out wearing Ku Klux Klan gear I might just end up marking the fuck out. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a fan of such blatant racism, but I wouldn’t mind if someone hung Santino Marella from a tree and planted a burning cross in his front yard. Maybe while we’re at it we can give David Otunga and The Great Khali the same treatment too. Now that would be a WrestleMania moment for the ages. Unfortunately, that’s not going to happen, so my interest level in this match is at an all time low. How low you ask? Let’s just check my trusty Give-A-Fuck-O-Meter and find out:

And there you have it folks, I DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THIS FUCKING MATCH!!!!! 

Winner: Team Teddy… No… Team Johhny… Does anyone even give a fuck about this match? I know I don’t.

Cody Rhodes © vs Big Show: Intercontinental Championship Match ~ If Cody Rhodes losses this match and the stupid ass Big Show ends up becoming the new Intercontinental Champion then the WWE can just go fuck themselves up the ass with a skyscraper sized dildo.

Winner: Cody Rhodes

Maria EatsNoodles, Manunos, Oh, who gives a flying fuck what her name is? and Kelly Kelly vs Eve Whor’es and Beth Penis ~ Just what WrestleMania needed… FILTHY SKANKY WHORES!!!!! And not just any whores, whores that can’t wrestle for shit, and the one that can wrestle (and just happens to have a penis, go figure) has to be regulated to having a Tag Team Match with whores who can’t, instead of defending her Divas Championship against that big fat ugly Kharma bitch, who was probably originally scheduled for a championship match against Beth, until she figured out that she would rather stay home and get pregnant again just so she can eat the baby when it pops out her mammoth sized cunt (because if you though her baby was stillborn the first time around then you’re sadly mistaken), placenta and all. I really don’t give a fuck about this match and will probably take this opportunity to take a piss if I end up going to my friend’s house and watching this craptastic event.

Winner: FILTHY SKANKY WHORES!!!!!.. Pick a team… Doesn’t really fucking matter.

Daniel Bryan © vs  Sheamus: World Heavyweight Championship Match ~ This is where your average simple-minded IWC writer will mention that this match is sort of like redemption for these Superstars since Daniel Bryan vs Sheamus for the United States Championship was bumped off the WrestleMania 27 card and was regulated to dark match status all because The Rock wanted to start of the show by wasting everybody’s goddamn time with a 20 minute promo. Well, I really don’t give a fuck about any of that shit so I’ll spare you the details. So yeah, do I actually give a fuck about this match? Let’s check my trusty Give-A-Fuck-O-Meter once again and find out:

I guess I don’t. Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure Daniel Bryan and the pasty white Irish bastard will have a hard-hitting match for the title, granted they get enough time that is, but this match has little to no build for me to even give an ounce of a fuck. Sheamus won a Royal Rumble he wasn’t originally scheduled to win and challenged Daniel for his title. That’s it. Boring shit. If there was more to it than that then maybe I would give a little tiny fuck, but this “feud” is nonexistent – like a sweet glorious rack on the flatchested AJ – so I don’t. I would like Daniel Bryan to retain the title as he is one of the best things going on Smackdown, but I have a feeling the pasty white Irish bastard is going to pull off the victory here.

Winner: I reluctantly pick Sheamus (fuck him though, GO DANIEL BRYAN!!!!!!)

Triple H vs The Undertaker: Hell In A Cell Match with Special Guest Referee Shawn Michaels ~ Finally, a fucking match I actually want to see! This will be the third time these two wrestle at WrestleMania and fuck what a hater says, both of their previous matches were fucking awesome. This might just be the last time we ever see The Undertaker compete in a WWE ring and I believe that he will retire with a 20-0 record at WrestleMania. A part of me wants him to lose though, just so I can sit back and watch stupid ass people riot over it. Shawn Michaels as the Special Guest Referee is a wild card and this match can really go either way, but I think the Phenom will rise above everything thrown his way and keep his streak intact. This should be a great match, and as a long time wrestling fan it saddens me to know that this era of wrestling will officially come to an end this Sunday. The new WWE era isn’t doing it for me anymore so maybe my era of wrestling coverage will also be coming to an end after WrestleMania 28. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted…

Winner: The Undertaker

Before I move on to the next match I would like to share this awesome “HHH vs Undertaker Battle Rap” by former WWE Superstar, John Morrison.  This shit is fucking hilarious:

Lmmfao @ Paul Bearer. Too bad Morrison never really got to show this side of him in the WWE and since he made fun of Triple H in this video I doubt we’ll ever see him in a WWE ring ever again. Oh well…

CM Punk © vs Chris Jericho: WWE Championship Match ~ Damn, did WWE drop the ball on Chris Jericho’s return or what? I mean, sure, Jericho was smart enough to guarantee himself a WrestleMania 28 WWE Championship Match in his contract when he returned to the company in January, but the build for this match could have been so much more than what it is. Jericho not speaking for weeks, when he should have just went straight after Punk was a fail and him not winning the Royal Rumble like originally planned or attacking Punk after his match against Ziggler at the Rumble was another fucking fail. A match which should be meant to show the fans who exactly is the best wrestler in the whole fucking world has been regulated to Jericho settling for cheap heat by verbally attacking Punk’s substance abusing family. While some think that was a nice touch to the feud, I feel that it was really unnecessary this early into the feud. Fuck it though, what’s done is done and here we are, WRESTLE FUCKIN’ MANIA BABY!!!!!!!!!

CM Punk sure has come along way hasn’t he? Just last year he was in a midcard feud with Randy Orton and his WWE future was uncertain and here we are a year later and he is main eventing WrestleMania as the WWE Champion! I feel proud for the Chicago Made Punk, but there’s no way someone the status of Jericho didn’t make sure that the WWE contract he signed before rejoining the company didn’t guaranteed him the win here. If given enough time this should be one of the greatest matches in WrestleMania history and I see Jericho winning dirty as this feud continues for a few more months, with CM Punk eventually winning back the WWE Championship, unless John Cena refocuses his attention on the title after his feud with The Rock comes to an end that is.

Winner: This can go either way, but logic says Chris Jericho wins for the sake of the feud.

John Cena vs The Rock ~ Finally… these two can shut the fuck and actually fucking wrestle already. Am I the only one whose sick and tired of the back and forth promos between these two? This feud should have been the most epic feud in wrestling history, but instead we got a bunch of bullshit promos. I’m glad that all the fucking talking finally comes to an end this Sunday and if these two don’t put on one of the best matches in WrestleMania history then the year-long build towards this match was just a complete waste of fucking time that could have been used for something else. Anything less than the best would be a disappointment. I hope these two go all out and fucking kill each other for the fans. While The Rock’s promos felt forced and he had to go for the cheap pops more often than not, I want to see The Rock, the wrestler we all knew and loved, beat the holy fucking shit out of John Cena. I also want to see Cena’s aggressive side come out as he fights for survival and has the match of his life. His legacy is at stake here and while I’m sure The Rock will lose in a passing of the torch type deal, it will mean nothing if that torch is just handed to Cena. He has to fucking earn it. I’m wishing and hoping for an all out war, multiple finisher spots and a good old fashion slobberknocker, but if their promo work is any indication of how this match is going to turn out it will just end up being a mediocre piece of shit. I have faith though and I’m sure that this match will be talked about for years to come. At least that’s what I expect.

Winner: John Cena

_____

Well, there you fucking have it. I previewed WrestleMania 28 so now you can all stop fucking harassing me about it already, damn. While I’m not super excited for the PPV like I usually am this time of the year, I might just watch this PPV in hopes that it is everything that WrestleMania 27 wasn’t and makes me fall in love with the product all over again. If not, then consider this my last wrestling related blog. Peace out bitches.

*Fades2Black*

  1. Capt. Smooth
    March 29, 2012 at 1:21 pm

    Big Show is The Human Torch!

    • March 29, 2012 at 10:14 pm

      Imagine masturbating with a fist full of fire… Ouch!

      • Capt. Smooth
        March 30, 2012 at 6:00 am

        In other words, with an STD?

        • March 31, 2012 at 1:13 am

          No, I mean fire, but I’m sure you will end up getting an STD… or a severe 3rd degree burn… hurts just to think about it.

  2. tikayoh@gmail.com
    March 29, 2012 at 1:33 pm

    The John Morrison video was pretty wild. But it was all very relevant. Yeah don’t expect him back after that but him doing that proves he doesn’t want to go back so good for him.

    That sucks WWE has fallen off your radar like that. I remember watching RAW, Smackdown and ECW. Now I only watch RAW and never walk away like wow at all. I didnt become a real big fan until Stone Cold arrive and I’ve only watch since because its the thing we did growing up, so it stuck. I walk away feeling like “if i missed this show and did some important life shit I wouldnt have missed a damn thing.The last time Raw left me feeling like wrestling was great was CM Punks promo, only cause I felt that TNA was about to come up cuz I’d watch them with him on there. But it was a plan…

    Fast forward to mania, i ordered it cuz the fellas are coming by and we gona have fun but I pretty much could care less about much of it.

    Orton vs Kane on paper aint so bad. Weak build but so what. Orton gets a spot on the card and his matches arent bad. I just DGAF. Orton wins

    Team vs Team is thrown together. MITB is wrestlemania and it sucks that these guys changed it. The majority belong on the pre show battle royal. Dont care who wins

    Show vs Cody should be in the match above since that match has to take place. I wouldnt put cody in the pre show but against big show aint much better. Cody all the way

    fuck the womens match, that EXTRA chick dont belong when you got a Natalya employed

    Sheamus vs DBryan I am looking forward to a little but it’ll be 10 mins cuz the company dont care. the rematches will be longer and better but at mania it just dont matter (sheamus)

    hhh vs taker got too much air time, we get it. 3 guys who wont perform unless its mania (or to cool off cm punk) dont like those guys. respect them but how do you care about the business when you take up that much time on raw and wrestlemania when the day after you will be gone? more butts in the seat? fuck that if you only give the future stars 10 mins and you get 30. it’ll be good but the future is scary when those guys actually stop wrestling

    punk vs y2j is a epic fail to me. match will be good but all those writers and thats all you got? corney story. just let them get more than 10 mins. batista vs cena was one of the big matches 2 years ago and it only got 13 mins so i bet wwe shit on it

    sure i wana see rock vs cena cuz the atmosphere will be wild but what a boring feud man. twitter?boots2asses,kung pow,lady parts,trending ect just garbage. cut those in half and allow 2 young wrestlers to wrestle for 10 minutes and you got some of your auidence back. the wrestling fans. i got Cena even though WE SEE YOU

    aite j, im done hogging your site, just hada air out lol

    • March 29, 2012 at 10:18 pm

      This will be the first time in a long time I don’t order Wrestlemania and have people come over and watch it. My friend is picking up the slack this year though and he will be having a little Mania party so I’m going over there and drinking up all the beers and eating up all the chicken wings and chips or whatever since when these motherfuckers come to my crib they fucking eat everything in sight and leave the house a mess. Time to pay it forward fuck that. I hope WrestleMania 28 can recapture that fire I’ve always had as a long time fan. It’s really been dying lately and I think the internet is to blame.

  3. March 29, 2012 at 2:51 pm

    This is the worst Wrestlemania build I can remember…ever. What the hell happened? It’s like this Sunday’s ppv is Over the Limit instead of Wrestlemania. The only match I care about it Team Teddy vs Team Johnny, and maybe HHH vs Taker a bit. Everything else has had either mid-year ppv level build (Cena/Rock, Punk/Jericho) or no build (Divas match, Bryan/Sheamus, Orton/Kane).

    • March 29, 2012 at 10:24 pm

      The last RAW before Mania was weak as fuck and definitely didn’t make me want to order the PPV. WM 28 looks like a good card on paper and I’m sure it will deliver, but the build up fucking sucked and could have been so much better.

    • March 30, 2012 at 8:31 am

      Shaman’s Harvest :
      This is the worst Wrestlemania build I can remember…ever. What the hell happened? It’s like this Sunday’s ppv is Over the Limit instead of Wrestlemania. The only match I care about it Team Teddy vs Team Johnny, and maybe HHH vs Taker a bit. Everything else has had either mid-year ppv level build (Cena/Rock, Punk/Jericho) or no build (Divas match, Bryan/Sheamus, Orton/Kane).

      The card is strong…the build would have been nice but not necessary. If the three main events meet expectations, no one will care about the build. Does anyone remember the build before the Mankind vs. Undertaker Hell in a Cell match?

      • Capt. Smooth
        March 30, 2012 at 5:47 pm

        Very true.

        • March 31, 2012 at 1:20 am

          A proper build is always necessary. WrestleMania is always pushed to both the die hard and casual fans alike. It’s supposed to be the highest grossing event in WWE’s fiscal year and should be treated like professional wrestling’s version of the SuperBowl. The last RAW before WrestleMania felt like any ol’ RAW. Didn’t give off a Mania vibe at all. Ratings are stagnant for a reason and its because people just don’t fucking care. Their banking too much on The Rock pulling in great buys, but Survivor Series did horrible numbers and the build for that was better than the one we got for WrestleMania. All the fans online that can’t wait for the PPV are more than likely streaming the event like the thieving little assholes that they are. Sure the card looks good on paper and this should be a good show, but they could have made it feel more special instead of just going through the motions.

      • March 31, 2012 at 8:13 am

        Yes, this is very true. This is exactly how I would feel.

        • Capt. Smooth
          March 31, 2012 at 11:48 am

          Ratings are stagnant, because there are more options.

          • April 3, 2012 at 1:11 am

            Face it, people are growing out of wrestling therefore they seek the other options. A real fan wont change the channel.

            • Capt. Smooth
              April 3, 2012 at 5:53 am

              A “die hard’ fan won’t.

  4. March 29, 2012 at 2:52 pm

    Don’t give a shit about Cody Rhodes or Big Show too. Rhodes is a highly overrated metrosexual and Show should be facing Shaq.

    • March 29, 2012 at 10:28 pm

      It’s been a while since the Intercontinental Championship has been defended at WrestleMania, but Cody Rhodes should be in a better feud as he defends the title he barely ever defends. He went from a red hot feud with Orton to a lukewarm feud with Big Show. I have a feeling Big Show might win which would be a huge mistake on WWE’s part. Show is already established, he doesn’t need a title to validate him and Cody should be defending against a younger star. Both the US and IC titles should be kept to the newer guys trying to build themselves up to main event status not comedy acts and washed up veterans.

  5. March 29, 2012 at 2:58 pm

    No offense to Dolph Ziggler, but the fact that wrestling is moving so much to male models wearing pink thongs makes me question how much long I’ll be able to watch. My interest hasn’t been so low since 5 years ago. I want badass wrestlers, not models dammit!

    • March 29, 2012 at 10:33 pm

      Exactly, even though Dolph Ziggler is a good wrestler and should be an important part of WWE’s future if he was to become a more serious character.

      I think he might be gay though.

      • March 30, 2012 at 10:24 pm

        What? What’s gay about walking around in only a pink thong with a pink shirt hanging out of it? I wear go-go boots with it too! I don’t think that’s gay! And so what if the locker rooms full of divas? My best friends a middle aged women! Who cares if Jack Swagger’s married to a model? I’m married to my root touch up products I ordered off the tv, which I never watch because I’m always at the gym! Nothing gay there! You’re crazy.

        *smacks ass a few times and walks away*

        • March 31, 2012 at 1:23 am

          Ummm, when did Dolph ZIggler ever wear a pink thong?

          • March 31, 2012 at 9:01 am

            It’s under his pink speedo…at least that’s what my people tell me.

            • April 3, 2012 at 1:14 am

              He has been looking extra queerish lately. WWE needs to have an intervention and make him man up his image. Might be the only thing keeping him away from the upper level of Superstardom.

  6. March 29, 2012 at 2:59 pm

    That’s why I supported Husky and Tarver so much. They represented the the good old days.

    • March 29, 2012 at 10:39 pm

      I really wish the Nexus angle took off instead of being feed to the dream crusher, John Cena. That’s what WWE desperately needed, some bad ass motherfucker who wreck shop as the babyfaces fight back for survival or even turn to the darkside once they realize they are getting owned on a regular basis. Problem was they were too green. They should have recruited establish stars that were fed up with the status quo and they might still be around today with a completely changed WWE landscape to boot. Oh well…

      • Capt. Smooth
        March 30, 2012 at 6:04 am

        I still buy Cena taking out a bunch of rookies. If they reformed now, it would be a different story.

        • March 31, 2012 at 1:25 am

          Yeah, because he doesn’t understand the concept of putting over the new talent.

          • Capt. Smooth
            March 31, 2012 at 11:49 am

            People wouldn’t have bought it. They were new and didn’t know yet. NOW, they would be deadly.

            • April 3, 2012 at 1:19 am

              No. They were new and nobody knew what they were fully capable of doing so it should have worked better than it did.

              • Capt. Smooth
                April 3, 2012 at 5:54 am

                But over time, you could see the cracks. By the time they really had a chance to do something, Cena had exploited their insecurities.

                • April 5, 2012 at 4:07 am

                  That’s why they shouldn’t have been fed to Cena so soon and they should have seeked out veteran guidance, duh.

                  • Capt. Smooth
                    April 5, 2012 at 5:52 am

                    So the attack was too soon I guess. I still think they could reform and be dominant.

                    • April 8, 2012 at 3:44 am

                      Hell no! Other than Daniel Bryan everyone else from Nexus has sucked. Wade Barrett is average I guess, but everyone else sucks.

  7. March 29, 2012 at 4:18 pm

    Ahahaha sounds like these rasslin’ dudes haven’t been doing a good job. Maybe Mr Macdonalds needs to bring them to Cali to get some waves ahahahahaha.

  8. March 29, 2012 at 4:42 pm

    I don’t get all this Rock passing the torch thing. Honestly, I think The Rock will win. I’m not going to say why now because I wrote a column on it and I spent long and hard with it so won’t spoil it. People are getting this passing of the torch from Hogan/Rock. This NOT the same. This isn’t new vs. old like Hogan/Rock was. This is two men in their prime out to prove a point. I hope you read my column on Sunday JCITY and you’ll see what I mean.

    Answer this question and think about it, which is better for business: The Rock to win, or John Cena to win?

    • March 29, 2012 at 5:31 pm

      John Cena to win.

      • March 29, 2012 at 5:39 pm

        Perhaps he will win, but what I’m saying is….it isn’t impossiple for The Rock to actually win.

    • Faces of Solie
      March 29, 2012 at 5:41 pm

      Simple. It’s much better for the business for John Cena to win at Wrestlemania. He’s actually going to be on the road week to week once the match is over, while The Rock will not.

      • Faces of Solie
        March 29, 2012 at 5:47 pm

        If the argument is that it’s better for John Cena to lose and turn heel or pull a Stone Cold (i.e. X7 main event), I’d say that there aren’t enough top tier babyfaces to feud with. Not to mention that half the crowd already boos the guy anyway.

        • Capt. Smooth
          March 29, 2012 at 7:56 pm

          Plus many of the people who boo Cena would cheer him if he turned heel.

          • March 29, 2012 at 10:52 pm

            Only way Cena losses is if he goes heel which is not happening any time soon. I wouldn’t put it past The Rock’s ego to guarantee himself the victory so it won’t hamper his movie career, but at the end of the day this is his ultimate acting job so losing shouldn’t be too much of a problem if it’s in the script. John Cena must win though since he is the face of the WWE. Having an outsider come in and whoop his ass then leave again is a stupid move. Rock has beaten some all time greats and is an all time great in his own right. Cena is not.

            When Cena beat Triple H for the World Championship that was a passing of the torch as Cena went on to become the man. Cena beating The Rock is a passing of the torch like “Hey kid, now you can make a legit claim to being an all time great now that you beat “The Great One”. If Rock wants to get a rematch then by all means come back, but he must lose at WrestleMania for the good of the business.

            If Rock wins he will just move on to his movies while trashing WWE like “Yeah, I beat their so call “top Superstar”. WWE sucks. Fuck them. Why should I ever go back? I already proved that I’m better than all of them in one night” and WWE can’t afford to have that happen. This is the same guy who ditched The Rock name all in the name of public perception so I wouldn’t necessarily trust him, plus the motherfucker just loves talking shit. Sure having The Rock come back for such a high profile match is good for the WWE, but love him or hate him, John Cena represents the current generation of professional wrestling so he NEEDS to win at WrestleMania.

            Unless it ends up in some kind of double disqualification or Rock beating Cena and then Cena snapping and turning heel like previously mentioned, I don’t see Cena losing. It’s much more than a simple match, it’s about creating a legacy. The Rock’s legacy is already etched in stone, John Cena must cement his by beating The Rock or else the current generation of wrestling is doomed if they can’t overcome the old one. Plus Cena lost at last year’s WrestleMania because of The Rock, do you really think he will lose two Mania’s in a row? And don’t forget the last time these two had a physical altercation was when The Rock gave John Cena a Rock Bottom at Survivor Series. Cena is due for some payback if you ask me.

            Either way I’m expecting a historic encounter that people will talk about for years to come. I hope they don’t disappoint. Or else…

            • Capt. Smooth
              March 30, 2012 at 6:06 am

              Cena’s a guy like Bruno Sammartino, Hogan, Austin that have defined an Era.

              • Capt. Smooth
                March 30, 2012 at 6:07 am

                Meant to finish…It would be a HUGE feather in Rock’s cap to beat Cena as well.

                • March 31, 2012 at 1:30 am

                  Rock doesn’t need it. He’s an icon in the industry. He’s had his career and did amazing things for the business, but his time has passed. It’s Cena’s turn to be made into an icon.

                  • Capt. Smooth
                    March 31, 2012 at 11:51 am

                    That’s why Cena should win, but he won’t be made into an icon, because the fans have changed and will reject that.

                    • April 3, 2012 at 1:22 am

                      He’s already an icon whether they like it or not. The fans will die, but John Cena’s WWE legacy will live on forever.

  9. Crazy Train
    March 29, 2012 at 4:51 pm

    Question: Is Rock going to be like the Undertake now and come back to wrestle only wrestlemanias? Didn’t he say he was going to wrestle next year too?

    • March 29, 2012 at 10:58 pm

      He might. I read the plan was another match with Cena at Summerslam and then the blow off match at WrestleMania 29. I don’t know though. Can John Cena actually stay away from the WWE Championship for that long?

  10. March 29, 2012 at 5:33 pm

    And why’s Tony Kegger in Ireland? Who just decides to get up one day and go to Ireland? Go to Canada.

    • March 29, 2012 at 5:38 pm

      I don’t want to stir stuff here but why are you so suspicious of Tony? Can the man not go to someplace without being questioned? lol

      • March 29, 2012 at 6:51 pm

        I’m suspicious of everyone here. Myself included.

        • March 29, 2012 at 11:01 pm

          Maybe because he’s Irish and wants to visit the homeland and see family he never gets to see on a regular basis. Maybe he really enjoyed St. Patrick’s Day and wanted to extend the experience. Maybe he just wants to butt fuck a leprechaun and write a blog about it… idk.

          • Capt. Smooth
            March 30, 2012 at 6:08 am

            Who doesn’t? *pause*

          • March 30, 2012 at 8:18 am

            THE INFAMOUS JCITY™ :
            Maybe because he’s Irish and wants to visit the homeland and see family he never gets to see on a regular basis. Maybe he really enjoyed St. Patrick’s Day and wanted to extend the experience. Maybe he just wants to butt fuck a leprechaun and write a blog about it… idk.

            Damn…all of that was right. The only thing that was incorrect was the part about St. Patty’s day because I arrived AFTER the holiday. But everything else was correct.

    • March 30, 2012 at 8:17 am

      Shaman’s Harvest :
      And why’s Tony Kegger in Ireland? Who just decides to get up one day and go to Ireland? Go to Canada.

      Because I got family there. More family there than here. I went to a restaurant and both of the young servers there were either related to me by blood or marriage.

      • Capt. Smooth
        March 30, 2012 at 5:48 pm

        That’s pretty cool.

        • March 31, 2012 at 1:31 am

          So you butt fucked a leprechaun? Well then…

          • March 31, 2012 at 7:53 am

            I couldn’t find one…

            • Capt. Smooth
              March 31, 2012 at 11:52 am

              Did you try a rainbow?

              • March 31, 2012 at 4:07 pm

                it didn’t rain.

                • Capt. Smooth
                  March 31, 2012 at 4:26 pm

                  Did somebody set fire to it?(besides Adele)

                  • April 3, 2012 at 1:30 am

                    So if you found one you would have fucked it? Interesting…

                    • Capt. Smooth
                      April 3, 2012 at 5:56 am

                      One could turn out to have some T and A.

  11. Kyle
    March 29, 2012 at 6:03 pm

    I don’t care if you end up hating wrestling and never want to watch it again, you should still write about it because this was a fun yet slightly ridiculous read that wasn’t bad for something you say you randomly pulled out of your ass.

    • March 29, 2012 at 11:06 pm

      You weren’t supposed to like this. I purposely wrote the worse preview I’ve ever written to piss off the people who keep asking me to cover WrestleMania as a be careful what you wish for or you might just fuckin get it type deal.

      FUCK!!!!!!!!!

  12. Al Sharpton
    March 29, 2012 at 7:40 pm

    I demand you change the Team Teddy vs Team Johnny portion of this WrestleMania preview before the NAACP is forced to take legal action against this site.

  13. Capt. Smooth
    March 29, 2012 at 7:57 pm

    I want a “Sally” chant for DB, dammit!!!

    • March 29, 2012 at 11:07 pm

      Sally? Why?

      • Capt. Smooth
        March 30, 2012 at 6:10 am

        YES! YES! YES! is like this…

        • March 30, 2012 at 8:22 am

          Capt. Smooth :
          YES! YES! YES! is like this…


          That is most fucking crazy obscure chant ever. If someone actually chants that on Sunday, I’ll mark out. That’s like more advanced than chanting “Tooth Fairy” at The Rock or “Super Shredder” at Kevin Nash. That’s like Boston chanting “Brian Scalabrine” at Sheamus.

      • March 30, 2012 at 8:19 am

        THE INFAMOUS JCITY™ :
        Sally? Why?

        I had to ask why too.

  14. Stephen
    March 29, 2012 at 9:17 pm

    How you even manage to have any fans is beyond me. All you do is disrespect everything from your readers to the topic at hand. This preview was garbage. Anyone that finds this crap entertaining should question their morals. Someone needs to come and put you in your place because your ego is way out of control and unjustifiably so. Anyone with integrity should join me in boycotting this site.

    • March 29, 2012 at 10:12 pm

      Stephen, no! If you boycott this site JCITY will quit and this entire site will be destroyed!

      Oh wait, actually nothing will happen.

      • March 29, 2012 at 11:13 pm

        I guess you missed this part of the preview:

        Be warned, I really don’t feel like writing about stupid ass wrestling right now, so I’m just going to reach deep down in the crevice of my asscrack and pull out a WrestleMania 28 preview (proverbially speaking of course) and if it doesn’t meet your precious high standards of IWC literature then fuck you very much bitch.

        So fuck you, fuck your family, fuck your bitch ass ancestors, fuck the AIDS infested monkies they evolved from, fuck your life, fuck your future endevours, fuck you once again and go fuck yourself. Thanks bitch. Now boycott these nuts in your mouth (proverbially speaking of course).

  15. Jacob
    March 30, 2012 at 2:28 am

    Good read, but was the Kharma part really neccessary?

  16. Capt. Smooth
    March 30, 2012 at 6:17 am
    • March 30, 2012 at 8:24 am

      I guess that means we won’t be seeing an Edge vs. Taker hair vs. hair match this year.

      • Capt. Smooth
        March 30, 2012 at 5:51 pm

        Unless it’s pubes…

        • March 31, 2012 at 1:44 am

          Edge looks like a whole new person. I might just end up cutting my hair soon also.

  17. March 30, 2012 at 8:25 am

    LMFAO at the JoMo rap. Where was THAT when he was in the WWE. Not only would it have saved his career, it would have gotten him that main event spot. Those comedy classes worked!

  18. March 30, 2012 at 2:56 pm

    I got many thoughts about this event but I’m planning to write my own preview on my blog and I don’t want to spoil anything.

    • March 31, 2012 at 1:47 am

      Whatever you say… Hell Gator!!!!

      • March 31, 2012 at 4:07 pm

        I knew it!

        • March 31, 2012 at 4:09 pm

          Knew what?

          • Capt. Smooth
            March 31, 2012 at 4:25 pm

            Inside joke. With the troll admitting he was a bunch of people in the comment section, some were thinking you might be one as well. I got the same thing.

  19. March 31, 2012 at 1:55 am

    Batista is in Miami and is meeting with WWE officials…there is also some Brock Lesner/WrestleMania 28 rumors floating around. Word is that they are supposed to have some kind of a confrontation at Mania which is weird because around Royal Rumble time I had said that if Lesner did come back to the WWE I wanted Batista to come back so they could have a match. This potential encounter has me a bit more excited for Mania. I hope it’s nothing lame and we get to see some big time legit returns from both guys. Maybe they get into The Rock vs John Cena mix? If The Rock is gonna have more matches in the WWE he should have matches with more than just John Cena, right? In my opinion, The Rock vs Brock part 2 at SummerSlam (or maybe WrestleMania 29) might just be bigger and more mainstream than Cena vs Rock since Brock can pull in all of his UFC fans. This also should be noted; The Rock’s last WrestleMania match was against Batista while Batista’s last WrestleMania match was against John Cena. Coincidence or am I reading to much into this news?

    Business is about to pick the fuck up if this is true and if this is all false rumors then fuck who ever broke the news.

    • March 31, 2012 at 7:54 am

      I miss Batista. Never saw the Brock Era so I’m interested in him too.

  20. March 31, 2012 at 9:06 am

    Capt. Smooth :
    HOLY SHIT!!!
    http://www.411mania.com/wrestling/news/231682

    Holy shit! He…he…he got a haircut! WUT DA HAYELL! Where’d the hair go! What’s going on here! Why isn’t TMZ covering this holy shit I’m so excited I’m going into convulsions!

  21. April 1, 2012 at 11:23 am

    Okay guys my preview is up on WR.

    I was going to send it to JCITY but he said in a column few months back that he wanted only exclusive content.

  22. April 1, 2012 at 2:21 pm

    OH MY GOODNESS my preview up too dawgs hahaha wut are the odds of dat it’s RIDICULOUS!

  23. April 1, 2012 at 2:22 pm

    Our preview is up.

  24. April 1, 2012 at 2:23 pm

    My previews up too you government mules! Sauce It!

  25. April 1, 2012 at 2:25 pm

    Meow preview’s up.

  26. April 1, 2012 at 2:26 pm

    Baby baby baby my previews up, baby baby baby Wrestlemania 28.

  27. April 1, 2012 at 2:29 pm

    Ok, so I’ll preview everyone’s preview but I’ll give you a preview before I preview the previews and give a preview of the final preview then finally preview Wrestlemania before WWE’s preview show before the preview when Wrestlemania starts including the previews before each match.

  28. Kyle
    April 1, 2012 at 2:52 pm

    No offense but this is the only preview I need. Even TJR’s 3 man preview couldn’t hold a candle to this.

  29. Lee
    April 1, 2012 at 3:27 pm

    Wiil anyone be talking about Wrestlemania here tonight?

  30. Kyle
    April 1, 2012 at 6:54 pm

    Does anyone else think that AJ using the same banner pic for TJR’s Wrestlemania post is a tacky low class move on his part considering there are tons of other pics he could have used?

    • April 3, 2012 at 1:35 am

      He isn’t known to be the most original person. All he does is copy everything he sees like the true cunt that he is. Anyone that used that logo after me is a bitch and deserves to die in the worse way possible.

  31. Kyle
    April 1, 2012 at 7:03 pm

    Does anyone have a livestream?

  32. Max
    April 1, 2012 at 7:14 pm

    Wow, Sheamus beat Daniel Bryan in 18 seconds!

    Here’s a working stream for anyone that wants it http://www.firstrowsports.eu/watch/116275/1/watch-wwe—wrestlemania-xxviii.html

    • April 1, 2012 at 11:54 pm

      It felt even quicker than that! That shocked me!

  33. Case
    April 1, 2012 at 7:39 pm

    Dead in here tonight. Good looking on that stream homie.

  34. Lee
    April 1, 2012 at 11:04 pm

    Rock wins! Rock win!

  35. April 1, 2012 at 11:14 pm

    Feeling unfulfilled. Rock and Cena wasn’t even that good. I think I could have put a sharpshooter on better than that.

    • April 1, 2012 at 11:55 pm

      I liked Rock and Cena. There was no way it could live up to expectations. It felt a little bit shorter than expected but great match!

      • April 2, 2012 at 1:07 am

        I didn’t really like it. I was expecting anticipating a John Cena victory, then at the end of the match Brock Lesnar would show up to confront Cena and set up the main event of WM29.

        HHH vs Taker was incredible though. Best match I’ve seen since Shawn vs Taker at 25. It’s pretty cool how Taker can be at this age, wrestle once a year, and still steal a show filled with young Superstars in their prime.

        The future of Wrestlemania doesn’t look too bright without HHH, HBK, or Taker though. It’s seems a combo of those 3 always end up making the show worth it.

        • Capt. Smooth
          April 2, 2012 at 5:49 am

          WM will be fine. It took time for those three to build their legacies. The new crew will need that time as well.

          • April 3, 2012 at 1:39 am

            Rock and Cena had almost no chemistry in the ring whatsoever.

            • Capt. Smooth
              April 3, 2012 at 5:58 am

              That usually happens in a first meeting. I hope they get more practice in the future.

              • April 5, 2012 at 4:10 am

                No it doesn’t. Rock was unprofessional and didn’t find the time to train apparently.

                • Capt. Smooth
                  April 5, 2012 at 5:54 am

                  He trained with Hawkins and Perfect Jr.

  36. April 2, 2012 at 8:07 am

    Shaman’s Harvest :
    I didn’t really like it. I was expecting anticipating a John Cena victory, then at the end of the match Brock Lesnar would show up to confront Cena and set up the main event of WM29.
    HHH vs Taker was incredible though. Best match I’ve seen since Shawn vs Taker at 25. It’s pretty cool how Taker can be at this age, wrestle once a year, and still steal a show filled with young Superstars in their prime.
    The future of Wrestlemania doesn’t look too bright without HHH, HBK, or Taker though. It’s seems a combo of those 3 always end up making the show worth it.

    I’m glad that Brock didn’t show up. Save him for RAW and let Rock have his moment.

    I would like to see the Taker and HHH match again, but after my first viewing, I think it’s better than last year’s match.

    • April 3, 2012 at 1:41 am

      Same exact finish as WrestleMania 26. Lame, but other than that it was a good performance. They had the better match last year though.

  37. TKO
    April 2, 2012 at 9:09 am

    For $50 bucks I was disappointed

    Wwe says shit like,rock taker and hhh help put buts in seats so new fans can see the young superstars.bullshit.how do you get to understand how good sheamus and dbryan are in 18 seconds?the extra host got more time and it was so poor we started gettin mad.cody vs show was 5 mins,why even have all that story tv time for 5 mins?cody can move on and show finally gets a win at mania and has achieved all titles but he beat a guy realistically he should easily beat.the gm match was fun I do admit,saw the end coming but so what

    I got into the orton/kane match and liked the shock end.punk/jericho I expected too much and the slow pace took a while to get into,it was good and gt better bu never felt great with jericho to me seeming a bit slow and unmotivated.hhh vs taker was very great but the fact that it was so long,drawn out and stole time from the future stars leaves a rotten taste in my mouth.rock vs cena was a big move match like rock vs brock,it was better than that but I never thought it was gona be as good as they acted.rock over sold and looked winded.his win means rematch so I’m fine with it.I’m just not the same kinda fan I use to be sorta like jcity.dbryan vs sheamus was a fail that took the whole event for me to get over cuz its one of my top matches to see…don’t get the company at all

    • April 3, 2012 at 1:48 am

      I’m glad I didn’t pay. I had fun watching it getting drunk with my peeps, but after a more critical viewing at home I don’t think some of the matches are as good as people say they are. Rock vs Cena was sloppy as fuck. They had no in ring chemistry. The whole Brodus Clay thing was a complete waste of time. Hated the Daniel Bryan thing, but loved the way the fans have been reacting to it. All they did during WM and RAW was chant YES! and DANIEL BRYAN!!!! WWE has turned him into a face without even realizing it.

  38. Capt. Smooth
    April 8, 2012 at 7:57 am

    THE INFAMOUS JCITY™ :
    Hell no! Other than Daniel Bryan everyone else from Nexus has sucked. Wade Barrett is average I guess, but everyone else sucks.

    Alone, many are below average. But as one and with the knowledge they have now, it could work.

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