Home > Brock Lesnar, RAW Comments, THE INFAMOUS JCITY™, WWE > Brock Lesnar Returns To WWE On Monday Night RAW The Night After WrestleMania 28 And Hits John Cena With A MotherFuckin’ F5 4/2/12

Brock Lesnar Returns To WWE On Monday Night RAW The Night After WrestleMania 28 And Hits John Cena With A MotherFuckin’ F5 4/2/12

Brock Lesnar Returns To WWE On Monday Night RAW The Night After WrestleMania 28 And Hits John Cena With A MotherFuckin’ F5 4/2/12


I was going to write about my wild and crazy (ie I was drunker than CM Punk swimming in a pool of Jack Daniels) WrestleMania 28 experience, but at this point, that shit is irrelevant as fuck because BROCK LESNAR IS BACK IN THE WWE!!!! Now, if you’re a smarky little asshole who’s addicted to the news and rumors provided by the “dirtsheets”, then I’m pretty sure you’ve all read the rumors this past weekend involving Brock Lesnar signing a one-year WWE contract just in time for him to make a WrestleMania 28 appearance. As we all know, that didn’t happen, which led me to believe that the rumor was just some asshole’s super elaborate April Fool’s prank meant to fool the “know it all” wrestling marks in the IWC. Turns out, the rumor is now a reality as Brock Lesnar – to the delight of the fans- made his return to the company that undoubtedly made him a household name. So, did Lesnar cut a promo to address the fans? Did he try to pander to the crowd asking for forgiveness for leaving the WWE for a failed career in the NFL and a lucrative one in the UFC, where he reigned as champion before everybody started knocking him the fuck out? No. Lesnar made his return by hitting John Cena with his F5 finisher as RAW went off the air.

For me, a moment like this is all I need to suck me back into being a fan after months of being unhappy with the overall product. Sure, I love seeing young stars shine and come into their own (which doesn’t seem to be happening fast enough for me and WHAT THE FUCK WAS UP WITH DANIEL BRYAN LOSING HIS TITLE AT WM28 IN 18 SECONDS!?!), but a part of me loves seeing some of the Superstars I grew up watching come back, still in their primes (unlike a Hogan or a Flair), looking to kick some motherfucking ass, and if it happens to be at John Cena’s expense, then even better. While I originally though Lesnar would come back to face off against The Rock, it seems that John Cena has developed a habit of attracting men whose name rhymes with cock and have left the WWE to pursue other interest while leaving the fans high and dry. Whatever, works for me. I don’t think I can ever get enough of seeing John Cena getting his ass whipped and when he’s on his A game, cutting edgy promos, or being aggressive in the ring, that’s also a win for me as a fan who has grown tired of his crowd pandering bullshit. My hope is that Lesnar destroys Cena and then another bad ass motherfucker from the past comes back and does the same (Batista?) until John Cena has no fucking choice but to turn heel in order to defend himself from the onslaught.

That was my face as soon as Brock Lesnar's music starting playing. I then proceeded to jump up and down like a 5 year old.

Anyways, it was great seeing Brock Lesnar back in a WWE ring. Hopefully he shows up more regularly than The Rock did, but I also hope that this is not yet another year-long feud that leads to another WrestleMania main event for John Cena. I’m thinking these two wrestle each other sooner rather than later, with the winner going on to win the WWE Championship before the Summer is over, which will then set-up a SummerSlam match for the WWE Championship against The Rock since he said he wanted the title on RAW and we all know that if The Rock wants something, Vince McMahon will give it to him on a silver platter. It’s not a question of if he will win the WWE Championship, it’s WHEN will he win it? But I digress. Rock will then hold on to the belt until he is ultimately dethroned by none other than John Cena at WrestleMania 29. That’s just a wild guess of what I think will end up happening this year in the WWE and if I’m wrong then fuck it that’s why I don’t bother doing any fantasy booking so sue me bitch. All I know is that shit is about to go down and I’m FINALLY interesting (for once) in seeing what happens next. Don’t fuck this up WWE or else I’m going to strap myself with bombs and take a trip over to Stamford, Connecticut.


  1. Crazy Train
    April 3, 2012 at 5:59 am

    I read he’s going to be showing up twice a month, then more when it gets closer to Wrestlemania. I couldn’t stand Cena before Wrestlemania but now I’m on his bandwagon. To lose to the Rock, then allow Lesner to come out and F5 him tells you he’s for the business. You dont have to like Cena, but you have to respect the hell out of him. That special with the Rock before last weeks Raw made me get on his bandwagon. I hope Brock comes back for more years to come. WWE needs a face like him to compete. Props to the Rock to for still sticking around. Dont know what the motive is, but I’ll take it. Raw was actually watchable last night. Jericho/Punk just stepped the game up BIG TIME. Love Jericho.

    Oh, and lets not talk about Lord Albert….I mean Tensai. What a joke. Go back to Japan. Love how Michael Cole covered up how he used to be a former WWE wrestler who left for Japan…ahahahahaha. Oh and hi-light of the night was the Prince Albert chants.

    • April 5, 2012 at 4:20 am

      The Jericho/Punk stuff should have been done on The Road To WrestleMania, not complaining because I thought it was awesome, just saying.

      Rock just wants to stick around so he could promote more movies. His ex wife is managing him now and was the one that suggested The Rock go back to WWE for more cross over appeal. Very smart woman there because if he is winning big time matches and actually becomes the WWE Champion that makes him more than your average movie star, it makes him larger than life, plus WWE can get some free publicity down the road when their WWE Champion does all of his media rounds which will happen. I believe he will get the belt soon and carry it for a few months ultimately dropping it at WM 29.

      Lord Tensai is a machine, but its only a matter of time before he becomes a comedy character. I can just sense it. Maybe he could be Brodus Clay’s first real feud. They can both just squash jobbers until their paths cross. Maybe form a tag team down the line or something.

      • April 5, 2012 at 8:35 am

        The Rock said on his DVD that he left the WWE because he wanted to make it in Hollywood on his own without the help of the WWE. Now that he has established himself as a legit Hollywood star to the point that Mick Foley’s kids didn’t know The Rock used to wrestle, he decided it was the right time to return to the WWE. The Rock never really left if you think about…he just took a little break. Now he’s back and I think he can stay for another 6 or 7 years.

        • April 8, 2012 at 3:46 am

          That’s bullshit considering that his first movie was a WWE Film.

          • April 8, 2012 at 10:25 am

            Well that’s why he left because then the WWE Films could no longer work on his movies. That’s why he dropped “The Rock”…he wanted to see if he could get real movie fans and not just people who like him because he’s a WWE guy.

            • April 9, 2012 at 1:11 pm

              He dropped “The Rock” name because Disney did not want to associate themselves with the wrestling stigma. Any other reason given is a lie.

              • April 9, 2012 at 6:20 pm

                Not every movie he did was a Disney movie. How many Disney movies did he do? The Game Plan, Tooth Fairy, and what else?

  2. Capt. Smooth
    April 3, 2012 at 6:05 am

    I only watched during commercials, but did catch Brock’s return. He’s back! Lord Voldemort has retur…Oh, it was Lesnar, not Voldemort. Crazy.

    Too busy watching the game, but I’ll catch RAW on youtube.

    GO BIG BLUE!!!

    • April 5, 2012 at 4:21 am

      Kentucky went wild when they won flipping over cars and setting the town on fire and shit, lol.

      • Capt. Smooth
        April 5, 2012 at 5:57 am

        Nothing compared to soccer fans. The media blew it up. They set couches on fire. A couple cars got vandalized and some dude got shot. Soccer fans will laugh at that.

        • April 8, 2012 at 3:47 am

          At least nobody stabbed a police horse with a pencil…

          • Capt. Smooth
            April 8, 2012 at 7:59 am

            Or an eraser.

            • April 9, 2012 at 1:13 pm

              When the Red Sox won the World Series everyone around Fenway Park started acting crazy flipping cars and whatnot and a bunch of cops came and shot bean bags into the crowd which killed a female, there was also polic on horseback and someone stabbed the police horse with a pencil.

              • Capt. Smooth
                April 9, 2012 at 5:42 pm

                But stuff like that happens in Boston everyday. (kidding)

                • April 10, 2012 at 9:50 am

                  I wish. Instead we have to deal with being shot. While only Boston’s nice white neighborhoods get shown on TV, the lower income based areas are the worst.

                  • Capt. Smooth
                    April 10, 2012 at 5:17 pm

                    I hear you. The local news is horrible in doing that.

  3. April 3, 2012 at 7:47 am

    By gawd the crowd as electric!

    That was a fantastic show and I can’t wait to see the ratings, I think they’ll get close to 4.0. Honest I do.

    Capt. I know a great site but doubt you’ll be allowed to use it.It’s called WMR-Sports.net

    I re-watched Brock’s return about 4 times over, I literally had goosebumps. When Cena listened to the crowd sing we want Brock, I said it’s just gotta be him returning, it’s gotta be!

    • Capt. Smooth
      April 3, 2012 at 7:58 pm

      No need to stream. I watched it on youtube. Felt bad for Sheamus. He didn’t do anything.

      • April 4, 2012 at 8:34 am

        Why do you feel bad for Sheamus?

      • April 4, 2012 at 9:07 am

        You don’t have to stream. They have an on demand section where they upload full shows…no parts, all one long play without ads,

        • Capt. Smooth
          April 4, 2012 at 7:57 pm

          Sheamus didn’t do anything except his job. If the smark crowds want to support DB, then cheer him but don’t take it out on Sheamus. He was jobbing early last year and had built up some nice face reactions and that shouldn’t go away, because a smark favorite got done wrong by the higher-ups.

        • Capt. Smooth
          April 4, 2012 at 7:58 pm

          I prefer youtube. Just more used to it.

          • April 4, 2012 at 8:02 pm

            Okay, I won’t force you 😛

            • Capt. Smooth
              April 4, 2012 at 8:34 pm

              Finally… lol

              • April 5, 2012 at 4:21 am

                Sheamus must die! OFF WITH HIS HEAD!!!!!!!

                • Capt. Smooth
                  April 5, 2012 at 5:58 am

                  J’s the Queen of Hearts?

                  • April 8, 2012 at 3:48 am

                    Wasn’t that Owen Hart?

                    • Capt. Smooth
                      April 8, 2012 at 8:00 am

                      No, he was a nugget.

  4. April 3, 2012 at 8:34 am

    Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena Last Man Standing in Chicago on April 29. Make it happen WWE.

    • April 5, 2012 at 4:23 am

      I doubt they wrestle each other so soon, but I wouldn’t mind seeing that.

      • April 5, 2012 at 8:36 am

        Brock Lesnar is already advertised to appear at Extreme Rules on the WWE website. Cena needs someone to face this month.

        • April 8, 2012 at 3:48 am

          We’ll see on Monday.

          • April 8, 2012 at 11:34 am

            From the Allstate Arena website:

            WWE Extreme Rules
            Sunday, April 29, 2012
            6:45 PM


  5. TKO
    April 3, 2012 at 9:25 am

    Wwe isn’t gona do a damn thing with those yes chants, they are stupid cuz that crowd turned dbryan into a bigger deal than he already was…but damn, brock lesnar? I ain’t no smarky asshole addicted to dirtsheets but I did go on a website and saw that in bold letters so there’s no way to avoid that. But he dint show up at mania so I figured they’d wait til raw or it was. Rumor…he f5’s cena for no reason right off the bat. Rock vs cena got a year build but cena vs brock gets 1 month? No way he comes back to lose either…interesting days ahead

    • April 5, 2012 at 4:24 am

      Super Cena is dead. He is slowly becoming a jobber to the stars, lmmfao.

      • Capt. Smooth
        April 5, 2012 at 5:59 am

        Then the smarks will start to cheer him. You know, to be “ironic”.

        • April 8, 2012 at 3:49 am

          So they’re hipsters now?

          • Capt. Smooth
            April 8, 2012 at 8:01 am

            Many are. Internet culture and hipster culture have many of the same qualities.

  6. April 3, 2012 at 2:38 pm

    I’ve nothing against B/Rock coming back. Big fan of both of them, so them kicking butt in WWE is something I always want to see. Just dont agree with the way their comebacks are being handled.
    I seriously doubt that the UFC crowd will tune in to see Brock do scripted fake fighting when they are used to seeing him do the real thing. While the guy is a monster, Brock without Paul Heyman is not as interesting as Brock with Paul Heyman. I mean, lets face it, he’s huge and tremendously athletic but he doesnt have the gift of gab that PH has. So while the Rock (who certainly knows how to use a mic) made a huge comeback( “Rocky” chants went for like ten minutes when the lights went out without there being even a hint of exactly who was going to come out), Brock never got that type of a welcome did he ?
    Especially considering that when these two had a huge feud that saw the People’s Champ take a People’s Beating thanks to Brock. I just dont see Brock making that kind of an impression.
    I’m hoping there wont be a Rock Vs Brock round 2 and Brock gets to feud with guys he can throw good matches with. Matches with guys like Kane, Big Show, Brodus Clay, Mark Henry and not squash matches with jobbers

    • April 5, 2012 at 4:32 am

      Brock can cut a decent promo and there are also rumors of Paul Heyman making a return to support Brock’s WWE return. I don’t know what’s going to happen in the next year, but it should be interesting. I don’t know how a Batista return figures into all of this because I’m sure his #1 target upon his arrival would also be Cena. Wouldn’t surprise me if Machine Gun Kelly’s words were a prophecy and Cena actually ends up becoming an underdog as everyone that returns makes a name for themselves at his expense.

      I’m sure Brock will end up facing the likes of Sheamus and Orton too.

  7. Capt. Smooth
    April 3, 2012 at 7:59 pm

    We’ll see how the “YES!!!” chants do with non-smark crowds.

    • April 4, 2012 at 10:09 pm

      Capt. Smooth :
      We’ll see how the “YES!!!” chants do with non-smark crowds.

      I can’t wait to see how the “Best Smarks in the World” reacts in less than four weeks.

      • April 5, 2012 at 4:34 am

        This is how:

        • Capt. Smooth
          April 5, 2012 at 6:00 am

          I want a “Maybe?” chant.

          • April 8, 2012 at 3:50 am

            I don’t think that will ever happen, lol. A NO chant is more of a possibility.

            • Capt. Smooth
              April 8, 2012 at 8:02 am

              There was a “No!’ chant from RAW during the Punk/Henry match.

              • April 9, 2012 at 1:17 pm

                Ha, I didn’t notice. I’m sure the YES chants will not be as relevant moving forward now that they are out of Florida.

                • Capt. Smooth
                  April 9, 2012 at 5:44 pm

                  Every Punk hit would get a “Yes!” and every Henry hit would get a “No!”.

                  • April 10, 2012 at 9:52 am

                    Lol, nice. No YES chants this week though.

                    • Capt. Smooth
                      April 10, 2012 at 5:19 pm

                      I heard there was, but fewer smarks made it harder to hear.

  8. Capt. Smooth
    April 3, 2012 at 8:05 pm

    J, I just noticed you passed 250,000 hits on the site. Cool beans.

    • April 5, 2012 at 4:35 am

      Cool. Maybe I should retire now…

      • Capt. Smooth
        April 5, 2012 at 6:00 am

        I’ll buy the drinks for the party.

  9. Chadam
    April 3, 2012 at 11:03 pm

    You were at Mania too? What section?

    • April 4, 2012 at 10:10 pm

      JCITY wasn’t at WrestleMania…he wrote that he attended a WM party.

      • April 5, 2012 at 4:38 am

        You don’t have to be at WrestleMania to have a WrestleMania experience. I’m sure nobody in the stadium got Rock Bottom’d through a glass table or got their head put through a wall, but that’s another story for another day, lol. I had fun.

  10. April 4, 2012 at 3:33 pm

    I see JCITY kept quite so he wouldn’t have to meet anyone if they asked, keep a hidden identity? 😛 jk

    • April 5, 2012 at 4:41 am

      I’m far from shy so I don’t think that would ever be a problem. I am thinking about going to WM 29 though since NY is only 4hours away. That’s if I don’t get bored with wrestling again like I have been the last few months.

      • April 5, 2012 at 8:44 am

        I’m just joking with you, I doubt you’re the shy type! lol.

  11. April 7, 2012 at 1:03 am

    lol…I’ve been watching Cena-Rock reaction videos on youtube…it’s fun watching so many cena fans cry and get upset. I can’t wait to see their reactions to Brock beating Cena.

    • Capt. Smooth
      April 7, 2012 at 11:23 am

      I saw one of when Cena beat Edge in the TLC match. You wouldve thought Cena had just murdered the guy’s parents or something.

      • April 7, 2012 at 3:46 pm

        I liked the ones with the angry smarks when Christian lost his title just two days after defeating Alberto Del Rio at Extreme Rules.

        • Capt. Smooth
          April 7, 2012 at 7:46 pm

          Nothing will ever beat the guy with the “How?’ look on his face when HHH tapped out to Cena at WM 22!

          • April 8, 2012 at 10:27 am

            Or “Miz Girl”!

            • Capt. Smooth
              April 8, 2012 at 6:48 pm

              The “How?” is better than Miz Girl, because it’s one thing to make a kid mad at a wrestling event, but it’s another to get a grown man look like that.

              • April 9, 2012 at 6:22 pm

                It’s not hard to get WWE footage of an angry grown man…the WWE cameras have just never caught me in the act…yet.

                • Capt. Smooth
                  April 10, 2012 at 5:49 am

                  Unless…you were that guy! Hmmmm?

  12. April 7, 2012 at 6:25 pm

    Look up Brock Lesnar live fan reactions, they’re actually hilarious.

  13. Anonymous
    April 8, 2012 at 3:17 am

    Brock sucks in the wwe and the ufc

  14. April 20, 2012 at 3:54 pm

    great website a lot of effort has been taken here im new to the internet so i found these posts very helpfull , thanks

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