Archive for the ‘News’ Category

Dolph Ziggler Beats CM Punk And Earns A Shot At The WWE Championship Next Week On Monday Night RAW

Mark my words, 2012 will be the year of the #Heel. It seems that 2011 was the year everyone started noticing the skills Dolph Ziggler possesses in the ring, but if you have followed me since 2010 you should know that I’ve been saying Dolph Ziggler is the motherfucking future of the WWE before it was all trendy. Last night on Monday Night RAW, with an assist from John Gingivitis, Dolph Ziggler defeated CM Punk to earn himself a WWE Championship Match next week on RAW. Dolph is fully capable of putting on great matches and when his opponents are on the level of a CM Punk then you know you are going to witness something special. Next week’s match is sure to be a classic and I’m going on record now and saying that DOLPH ZIGGLER WILL BE THE NEXT WWE CHAMPION!!!

I can just feel it in the air. Can you? Change is coming. Ziggler can definitely beat Punk on his own merit, but I think there might be some foul play involved. Punk as champion has been bad for ratings and there is talks that WWE officials want him to drop the title sooner rather than later. What I think is going to happen is whoever the mysterious force that is supposed to return on January 2, 2012 is going to play an important part in the outcome of the Ziggler vs Punk match. I think they will cost CM Punk his WWE Championship and then feud with Punk leading up to Wrestlemania. As for Ziggler, he fucking deserves this chance to shine. He has continuously had high quality matches and he can definitely hang with WWE’s best as proven by his matches against Punk, Orton and Cena. 2012 is the year of the #Heel. Remember where you heard it first.

R-Truth Returns From His Drug Related 30 Day Suspension And Beats The Miz’s Ass

Last night on Monday Night RAW, R-Truth came back from the 30 day suspension he earned for smoking synthetic marijuana (I know, who the fuck does that?) and got revenge on The Miz for putting him on the shelf (so goes the storyline). I know I said I was never going to review Monday Night RAW again, but this is not a review and the only reason I’m even posting this shit is because I thought Miz getting fucked up was fucking awesome. Miz has been known to hand out vicious ass whoopings every once in a while, so it was fun watching him get what was coming to him. R-Truth was very aggressive in his assault of his former Awesome Truth tag team partner, going as far as punching his fucking face in while he threw Miz into the ringside barricade. He also tackled Miz over the announce table, slid him on the surface of the announce table in hilarious fashion, threw him into the steel steps and hit him with the extremely dangerous WATER BOTTLE OF DOOM!!! Seeing The Miz get got was one of the greatest RAW moments in Chicago and I can’t wait to see where this feud goes next. Now that’s whatsup.

Dear IWC, CM Punk Sucks And Is Bad For Ratings.

He’s 2011’s hottest commodity. The IWC loves him. Hardcore fans have regained faith in the product because of him. He sells a ton of merchandise and he’s the voice of a new generation, but it seems that casual fans just don’t give a fuck about CM Punk as the WWE Champion. Punk’s segments on Monday Night RAW have been losing viewers left and right. It’s a real shocker when one of the most popular Superstars on the current roster draws the worst ratings of the century. Ratings haven’t been this bad since 1997 when WWE was in the mist of rebranding itself. WWE officials have been contemplating on taking the WWE Championship off Punk due to his inability to draw in the casual viewer, which says alot about the current product. We might end up being stuck with yet another John Cena WWE Championship run if WWE officials think that might help boost the ratings. More after the jump.  Read more…

Daniel Bryan Cashes In Money In The Bank And Wins The World Heavyweight Championship At The WWE TLC PPV Instead Of Waiting Until Wrestlemania 28 As Promised

Daniel Bryan is a good for nothing hypocrite! After promising to cash in his Money In The Bank contract at Wrestlemania 28 in order to secure his Wrestlemania moment as a main eventer, Daniel choose to win the championship in cheap heel like fashion as he pinned Big Show for the title, a title Big Show had only won mere minutes prior. While I would usually be happy for Daniel Bryan, the little fucker proved that he is nothing but an untrustworthy douchenozzle. Don’t even get me started on the fact that when he cashed in his opportunity at the championship, Big Show was still on the fucking mat after taking a DDT on a steel chair by Mark Henry. Now, correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t the challenger supposed to get on their feet before the referee rings the bell? Daniel is fully capable of winning the World Heavyweight Championship on his wrestling ability alone, so why the fuck would he stoop to such despicable means to attain the gold?

Zack Ryder Wins The United States Championship At The WWE TLC PPV

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!  He did it. He really fucking did it. Zack Ryder is the new United States Champion. FUCK! How the fuck did this happen? Why the fuck did this happen? I fucking hate Zack Ryder. I blame John Cena for this. I also blame all the easily amused motherfuckers that reside on the Internet. Fuck. Zack Ryder is nothing but a glorified midcarder who’s career was in the crapper until he found salvation on YouTube. Fucking YouTube!!! Fuck, this must be a bad dream or something. What’s next, a former MTV reality star winning the WWE Championship? Oh wait…

North Korean Leader Kim Jong ll Is Fucking Dead

2011 hasn’t been too friendly to dictators/terrorist it seems. First Osama, then Gaddafi, and now Kim Jong II has just been pronounced dead. He was 69yrs old. I don’t really know much about him except for the fact that he was a nuclear weapons loving asshole who has threaten to blow up the United States of America on numerous occasions by testing his weapons nuclear range, which is rumored to be fully capable of reaching the coast of California. He is also known for letting his country go into poverty as he wasted all of his resources into creating the most technologically advanced nuclear weapons known to man, but to me he will always be the funny speaking antagonist in the “Team America” movie. I guess this would be the part where I say rest in peace, but I don’t feel that Kim Jong deserves my respect, so fuck him and may he lick a million motherfucking cocks per second… IN HELL!!!!!

Read more…

Cena Sucks: Bad Idea Or Great Marketing Scheme?

Cena Sucks: Bad Idea Or Great Marketing Scheme?


In a move that might surprise some John Cena fans, WWE are now selling anti-Cena merchandise. The T-shirt pictured above sarcastically asks “Let’s go Cena?” in small writing with an all-caps and extremely larger written proclamation that reads “CENA SUCKS” right under it. The back of the shirt reads “WE SEE (as illustrated by Cena’s crossed out “You Can’t See Me” logo) U”. Personally, I think that this is a great marketing scheme. No matter how you feel about John Cena as a wrestler, there is now an official WWE shirt to express your opinion on the man. Read more…