Archive for the ‘Roster Evaluation’ Category

An Impact Wrestling Roster Evaluation: Part 2 by Shaman’s Harvest

An Impact Wrestling Roster Evaluation: Part 2 by Shaman’s Harvest


The other half of the Impact Wrestling roster fucking sucks. Every woman that works there is either retarded or a whore (or just retarded whores), and every man that works there either can’t find a real job or can’t support their crack habits on welfare checks and food stamps alone because they lost all the money they made in WWE on lottery tickets or divorce payments. They all get Super F’s and I wish the Impact Zone would get struck by lightning and burn to the ground. Here’s to hoping they get canceled soon.

A TNA fan

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An Impact Wrestling Roster Evaluation: Part 1 by Shaman’s Harvest

An Impact Wrestling Roster Evaluation: Part 1 by Shaman’s Harvest


Nope, this isn’t an interview with the entire Impact Wrestling roster (but I will so do that eventually because it would be hilarious), this is a formal evaluation of the TNA Superstar roster. I have seen WWE roster evaluations, but I have never seen an evaluation of the Impact Wrestling roster, so I thought I would give it a shot. The terrible thing about the company is that they have a great talent roster when you actually look at it (better than WWE’s), but unfortunately, the goofballs in charge seem to have no idea how to use it. I think a good way to really get to the bottom of the problems on this show as well as how to fix them, is to look at the guys they have and offer some ideas on how to use them (since I am clearly a better wrestling booker than guys who have been in the business for decades… don’t worry, I’m sure you are too).

I guess I would consider myself a regular Impact Wrestling viewer. I tune every Thursday… I don’t always watch it or stay on that channel, but I think I got the main idea of what’s going on there. So, since I’m evaluating the roster, I should probably find a ranking system of some sort, hmmmm… I’ll go with an A, B, C, D, F, Super F ranking system and I’ll give the peeps a + for potential and – for slowing down. I’ll also give a short paragraph with my thoughts on them.

A – Main event level Superstar. Consistently puts on good performances and adds to the show weekly. Can be considered a draw.

B – Upper midcard superstar with the potential to improve. May not be a big draw, but clearly adds to the show.

C – Guys who are just there. They don’t add to the show, but they don’t really take anything away from it either. They have the potential to improve, but are currently support players.

D – Wrestlers with basically nothing going on. Nobody really cares what they do or they rarely appear on the show.

F – Annoying, overrated, terrible wrestlers. These are people that make you want to change the channel when you see them. They could be released tomorrow and nobody would care.

Super F – People I personally hate. They can all go to hell.

So let’s do this! Alphabetically of course. Part one will include Abyss-Jeff Jarrett, part two will finish it up. Read more…